Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Horrible things have been done, clouds in the sky, away....

Well THIS movie sucked.


Great Krypton!  Merciful Minerva!  Holy Oleo, Batman! Great Hera!  Holy Moley!  This movie was just plain awful.

It's supposedly about the founding of The Justice League, but it's with all this New52 crapola that DC's been running for the last three years or so.  Pure Tripe.  It was SO bad, I couldn't even finish the damn movie.  And while I'm NOT a prude (as everyone here should know, unless this is your first trip to the Palace.  In which case, wander around a bit, you'll see what I mean), but the movie is filled with sweat words.  I heard a bullshit, damn, hell and shit.  And this is in an ANIMATED movie that I thought was geared towards kids.  Really, you couldn't keep the language clean?  You had to ruin and smear that along with the DC characters themselves that I know and love?

Wonder Woman has a sword and LOVES using it, slicing up monsters and forcing an ice cream vendor to give her free ice cream.  She uses he magic lasso to force a guy yelling at her to admit he dresses up in a Wonder Woman costume cause it makes him feel strong.  No, really.

Superman is an arrogant fuck.  And when Superman and Wonder Woman first see each other, they fall in love.  Blech.

Cyborg is created.  And yes, if you're asking yourself, "Who is Cyborg and why is in the Justice League?", those are damn good questions. I can only say that I figured DC wanted a black founding member of the team and he's....well, he's really the only black hero in DC. (not really, I know. I know there's Vixen and Black Lightning, but I'm on a roll here)  And it'a CRAPPY origin too....he's just a whiney kid who's pissed off cause his dad won't pay attention to him and he does something stupid.

And there was a kid who I thought was gonna be a Robin, cause he snuck his way into a football game and then stole a players jersey.  But no, it's turns out he's Billy Batson and he turns into Shazam with no origin at all.  Innocent good hearted Billy Batson is now a juvenile deliquent in foster care.


And it was at that point I turned the damn thing off.  And while Green Lantern was in the movie and Flash played a small part, in the time I watched it I saw nothing of the Martian Manhunter OR Aquaman.  Horrible, simply horrible.  A waste of time and money.

POLT

1 comment:

Michelle M. said...

God. It sounds awful.

Like an ice cream vendor would have to be forced to give WW free ice cream.