I may not be a doctor who can cure your ills...

Where I grew up, we could pick up Pennsylvania PBS and Maryland PBS. And when I was just a young Polt, I tried to watch a Dr. Who rerun on the PBS station. They replayed them Saturday nights at like 11:00 or something. But it was in black and white. And had really cheesy special effects and sets and dialogue. And I just could NOT follow what was going on.

Then, in my late 20’s, I watched another episode. Still, just could NOT get into the storyline. Then, just a few years ago, I heard that they were starting up with a new Doctor, the tall bald-ish guy. I watched the first episode of that…or rather the first portion of that. While the quality of the episode was dramatically better in terms of look, sets, special effects and such, the storyline itself was simply too convoluted for me to get interested in and I turned it off before it was even half over.

Then, late last year sometime, I stumbled upon an episode with the newest Doctor. It dealt with statues of angels that could only move when no one was looking at them, and time travel as well. I know it all sounds convoluted what I wrote, but honestly, I was captivated and loved it. So I've caught a few more episodes, and I'm totally into it. I don't know what this has now that it didn't have before, but I'm trying to catch as many episodes of it as I can.

And then there's the Doctor Who spin-off Torchwood. I watched this just cause it followed Doctor Who the one night. And it too involved time travel. And best of all, for me, the guy in charge Captain Jack, is apparently bi-sexual. And the next thing I know, he's liplocking with the guy back in 1941! On the dance floor! In front of the whole crowd! Oh, I nearly cheered!


So I watched the episodes since then, the final one for last season and the first one of this season. And there's this guy that works on the team, Iogi (?), who is apparently Cap'n Jack's sometime shag partner. Schweet! I loved that the bad guy in the last episodes (someone from Cap'n Jack's past, and who had a pretty nice kiss with him as well), called that guy "Eyecandy". made me chuckle.


I used to ignore Doctor Who and his fans, privately mocking them for being so fanatical about something that was, in my opinion, so poorly done and uninteresting. And now....I'm all about BBC America Saturday nights to watch these!

*SIGH*....I'm a fan now of Doctor Who...my journey into the land of total geekdom is now complete.

POLT Listening to "Uninvited" by Alanis Morisette

"I can show you where the STD clinic is." "I BET you can." - Polt

I'm boiling mad, still i cant live without you...

Ryan, over at http://aguyinlove.blogspot.com/ had this little list he thought of: 5 things (not people) he could not live without. And he kinda sorta challenged us all to come up with our own lists. Well, not challenged, really, but at any rate, I took up the challenge.



1) My Computer. This one does seem to be a ubiquitous answer with everyone saying it. But I would add to this, that I’d have to have Internet Access as well. A computer is fine, but with a computer AND the Internet, the whole world is open to me, I can spend countless hours doing a whole lot of nothing, and let’s not forget all…that…porn!














2) My comic books. I’ve been collecting comic books since 1977. They’re like an old friend, always there when I need some relief from the real world. In actuality, this one should have been number one, cause I’d sooner give up the computer than the comic books.









3) Sex. Either alone or just by myself. I think this one is pretty self-explanatory.


















4) Mama Polt’s home cooking. Oh. My. God! Can that woman cook! And she LOVES to cook. She cooks all the time. Her fridge is always full. There’s always something delicious there to eat. And her leftovers are nearly almost as good as the originals. It’s amazing.









5) A car. Not specifically the car I’m in now, just a vehicle of some sort to get around. I don’t live in the city, and a lot of things (work, gorceries, movies, etc, etc, etc) are just not in walking distance. When I have to leave the car overnight at the mechanic for work to be done on it, it seems like I’ve lost a limb or two.








And allow me to clarify that, with the except of the photo of Mama Polt's cooking, none of these photos were taken by me or feature anything I have....which is quite an unfortunate circumstance, especially in the case of the third photo....

POLT Listening to "Where's Your Head At?" by Basement Jaxx Oil: 91.37 (-.49); Gas: 3.01 (-)

Don't be a dick burglar. - Mini-Muff, Another Gay Movie

Undress me, will I look like a fool (Part 94)...

It's once more time for...

This past Sunday, kids, I slept in, got up late, decided not to shower or shave, not like I had anything going on. And then, I got a surprise call from A Local Celebrity, Mr. David Parispeking. He was insisting I go eat wings with him RIGHT THEN! Well, hey, who am I to deny a celebrity anything, so off we went.

The meal was outstanding, the conversation fun, the waitress...a bit ditsy. At any rate, on the way home, I had the radio on, and was singing, as I often do, and I had my camera sitting next to me, as I often do, and so I picked it up and snapped a photo, despite the unshaven-ness, unshowered-ness, that was me at the time (hence the hat, to cover the bad bedhead...although I have no idea why I have it on backwards...)


I was listening to "Ball And Chain" by Social Distortion, and I think when I snapped it, I was in the midst of the "AND" part of "ball and chain" in the chorus of the song. But who knows.

At any rate, to see what other people have put up, just click the HNT sign in my sidebar.

POLT Listening to "Supermassive Black Hole" by Muse

Daylight is not a friend of the drag queen. - Lady Bunny

Got your tongue pierced once, and you say you got another...

Wow.....



Metal detectors at the airport must really be a bitch for him. Course, if there's a lucky security guard there, this may require a thorough strip search......

POLT Listening to "Hard To Be" by Audioslave

Arbolist...look up the word. I don't know, maybe I made it up. Anyway, it's an arbo-tree-ist, somebody who knows about trees. - George W. Bush

We are immortal, we are the last two left...

So, John Edwards has dropped out of the presidential race.



I'm surprised. Not that he did it, but at the timing. I was talking to Johnnie last week sometime, and he said if Edwards doesn't win Florida, he would drop out. I didn't think so. I thought Edwards would hang in there at least until Super Tuesday next week, and then see. I thought he might get a block of delegates to take to the convention with him, and then could maybe be the kingmaker, depending on how close it was between Clinton and Obama. But no, clearly I was wrong.

I am saddened by his leaving, just as I was saddened by the lack of people responding to his message and backing him. I've been supporting him for nearly a year I think. In total honestly, I backed him first because we NEED a Democrat in the White House, and I thought he was the only one that could win. I thought the country would never vote for a black man or a woman. Obviously, I was wrong.

But as I listened to him, I found myself agreeing with him more and more. His pointing out that corporations RULE this country, and we've got to take them on to make things better for the average American really rang true to me. That's pretty much how I feel about things. I liked that he wasn't afraid to point out that there ARE two Americas now, a rich one, and everyone else. And how the rich and the corporations were running this country into the ground, at the expense of everyone else, soley to line thier own already bulging pockets. I liked what I heard so much that last fall, I donated money to his campaign.

But some things are not meant to be.

When the Pennsylvania primary rolls around in early April (two months after it's all over), I'll be voting for Edwards. Not that it will matter then, but primaries are for the parties to pick who they want to represent them in November, and I still want Edwards to be that person, so, in a totally symbolic gesture, I'll still vote for him. I always try to vote my conscience.

For quite some time, I've been saying "I support Edwards, but am leaning Obama." and that still holds true. So now, I hope that Obama does better than Clinton. But please, dont' get me wrong, come the fall, I will enthusiastically support whoever the Democratic candidate is because 1) we need to get some sense and logic back into the White House, and we need to give the Democratic Congress someone who will work WITH them and not against them just because he can, and 2) Any one of the three Democratic candidates is head and shoulders above the best of the Republican field, hands down.

Yes, I am sorry that Edwards left, although I can't blame him for it. You can only continue to lose so many races before the racing itself becomes pointless. But I am fully prepared, ready and anxious to do all I can to make it so that I can go to DC in January of next year and watch a Democrat being sworn into office, just as I did in January of 1993.

POLT Listening to "Flash" by Queen

Why don't you mentor a child how to read? - George W. Bush

Cut their hair short, wear shirts, and boots (Part 28)...

Wife Beater Wednesdays

POLT Listening to "Boys Keep Swinging" by David Bowie

What you do for yourself is fleeting and dies with you. What you do for others has unending benefit and is eternal. - Jerold Panas

Tonight, I want to dance with somebody else (Part 35)...

Wednesday's Weekly White Boy Dance

All I'll say is, he needs to have tighter pants, if he's gonna accentuate his ass like that.

POLT Listening to "Born Too Slow" by The Crystal Method Oil: 91.85 (-.08); Gas: 3.01 (-)

That parking lot had more traffic than Mariah Carey's vagina. - MadTV

Inarticulate speech, inarticulate speech of the heart...

Oh, I wish, HOW I wish I had come up with this. But no, I had to steal this, from Donnie V 2.0 at Famous Like Me:

This year the State of the Union Address and Groundhog day fall in the same week. As it has been pointed out, "It's an ironic juxtaposition of events: one involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a creature of little intelligence for prognostication, while the other involves a groundhog."






Hehehehehhe *snicker, snicker* I love it. Simply. Love. It.

POLT Listening to "Chelsea" by Elvis Costello

There's nothing more deep than recognizing Israel's right to exist. That's the most deep thought of all...I can't think of anything more deep than that right. - Bushie

Grabs my soul, shakin' through my body like a super bowl...

Since the Super Bowl is this Sunday, I think I need to look into my crystal ball and make a prediction (not that my record on predicting football playoff games is worth mentioning).

I think the best way to go about this is to compare the lynchpins of the respective teams: The quarterbacks! This year it's the New England Patriots Tom Brady vs The New York Giants Eli Manning. Let's see how they compare:

1. Age: a younger man will, in theory, be a better quarterback (this theory of course ignores Brett Favre this year, but Brett didn't make the Super Bowl, now did he?)

Brady: 30

Manning: 27

Advantage: Okay, that one's basically a tie.

2. Stats: a larger guy will be able to withstand tackles and such and theoretically, have more muscles to throw farther (somethings can be said for a smaller more agile man with a more precise throwing are doing well too...but I'm ignoring that)

Brady: 6'4"/225 lbs

Manning: 6'4"/225 lbs

Advantage: Okay, well that one is actually a tie!

3. Experience: in a football kinda way. While I would LOVE to be privy to thier experience in...other areas, even Uncle Polt has some limits to his knowledge gathering skills.

Brady: 3 Super Bowl wins (4 times to the Super Bowl in 8 years of play: 50%)

Manning: 1 Super Bowl appearance ( 1 time in 4 years of play: 25%)

Advantage: Brady

4. Cuteness: always an intergral determinating factor in winning games.

Brady: Manning:

Eli's a lot cuter than his brother Peyton, but I still gotta think Brady is the cuter one. And the sexy stubble...you think Manning can even GROW stubble?

Advantage: Brady

5. Body Hotness: this factors into the physical strength and stuff...sorta, somehow...

Brady: Manning:

The photo of Brady's not terribly clear, but Manning looks a bit....less sexy, than does Brady. And if there's any question, check out his arms in this photo:

And plus, he's holding a lil baby goat...Awwwww....

Advantage: Brady

6. Place of Birth: eh, why not?

Brady: San Francisco

Manning: New Orleans

The Gay Mecca vs The Bible Belt

Advantage: Brady

7. Relationships: Oh, like anything listed here means anything

Brady: "Playing the field", not tied down, but dating that Brazilian model Gazelle Bunchatitzen or something like that.

Manning: Engaged to a girl he's been dating his college.

Well, both of them are terminally straight apparently, but at least Brady's only got Super Bowl rings, not engagement ones, on his fingers. And really, is Manning capable of even getting a Brazilian supermodel (see questions 4 & 5)?

Advantage: Brady

8. The Teams: the Patriots have been a juggernaut this year. Unstoppable. Even in the games where they didn't play thier best, Brady got back on the field and drove them into the endzone like there wasn't even another team on the field. The Giants could only get a wildcard, and had to win in Tampa, Dallas, and Green Bay to get to the big game. Which is kinda impressive, but still, their opponents are the freakin' Patriots!

Advantage: Brady.

So, to summerize, the score is Brady 6, Manning 0, Tie 2. Brady and the Patriots will win.

I think the trump card was, though, the photo I found of Brady's jockstrap.

Couldn't find anything anywhere with Manning in a jockstrap.

POLT Listening to "Speed Of Sound" by Coldplay

Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony! - Dennis, Monty Pyton And The Holy Grail

An utterance, information, don't mince words (Part 81)...

TMI Tuesdays

These come from http://tmituesday.blogspot.com/ each week. IF you're not playing along, maybe you should be.

1. Would you stay in a relationship with an physically unfaithful partner? It would depend. If we have an open relationship, no. If we have an exclusive relationship, well, I'd certainly have a talk with my partner, and if it couldn't be resolved, then no, I wouldn't stay with him.
2. Would you stay in a relationship with an emotionally unfaithful partner? How would I know they were emotionally unfaithful? If I did, then I go with my answer above. If i didn't, well, then no, what reason do I have to leave?
3. On a scale of 1-10, how important is the recognition of birthdays to you (your's, a friend's, a partner's)? Well I'm a card sending fool, so everyone I know gets birthday cards...albeit usually a few days to a few weeks late. I like getting a few cards in return. Celebrating my birthday doesn't matter to me really. Going out for a few drinks with friends would be nice, but so is staying home and reflecting on the past year of my life alone.
4. When you have a "toe-curling" orgasm, do your does curl up, or down? Well, usually when I'm in the midst of a "toe-curling" orgasm, the driections of my toes are really not anywhere near a concern for me. But I guess they probably curl one way and then the other....that would be the BEST kind of toe-curling orgasm!
5. Every one has a pet peeve, tell me one of yours. People talking on cellphones while in a line that I'm waiting in. I really don't care was Cindy said, or what you're having for supper, or where you're meeting later. If that call is so damn important, get outta line and talk to them. Don't speak at several decibels above a plane engine so everyone can hear you.
Bonus (as in optional):Name someone famous who you have no sexual interest in but would have sex with just to brag about it? George W. Bush....course it didn't cause Larry Craig to resign, so I guess Bushie wont go either. How about Heidi Klum or some other female supermodel. Just so I brag to all the str8 boys that I did her.

POLT Listening to "At Last" by Etta James Oil: 91.93 (+2.69); Gas: 3.01 (-)

It's a lot more than mussed hair. I got puffer fish quills in places you wouldn't believe. - Power Boy, Titans East Special #1

Flame, supermodel sandwich, can I join...

I have not been watching "Make Me A Supermodel". I HATE 'reality' shows like this. These people don't have to "DO" anything, just like be there. And we're supposed to watch them and be entertained. It reminds me of "Housewives of Orange County", that lesbian gym show, the show with the bitchy hair cuttery guy owner, the Millionaire Matchmaker, and even some of the games like "Smarter than 5th grader" and "Deal Or No Deal". ooooh, how I hate that last one. you could put a monkey up there and have him point to briefcases, and it would be just as entertaining, and definitely faster!

I do like "Project Runway" cause it's about people doing something, it takes some skill. I like Jeopardy, cause it takes some smarts. Don't like Wheel of Fortune, cause it takes very little in the way of thought or skill to win that.

Basically, I don't like shows that have me sitting there watching stupid vapid people. And yet I'm interested in politics, to figure.

HOWEVER, having said all that, i saw these clips from the last episode of "Make Me A Supermodel" and now....I might have to change my mind and start watching...





Yes, they are both str8 boys. *SIGH*........um, what was I saying......

POLT Listening to "Rehab" by Amy Winehouse

I'm going to shove that overconfident, judgmental grin down his throat. One tooth at a time. - Hyperion, Hyperion & Nighthawk #3

There's a ghost in my house, i can't hide...

Since discovering late last year that my camera can take videos (who reads instruction booklets? Don't judge me), I've decided to do a little video for my mom's birthday in March. But I wasn't at all sure how to do it. Luckily, after asking a co-worker, I discovered that I already HAD Windows Movie Maker on my computer! Who knew? (I said, don't judge me!) But before I'd do that I wanted to tinker with it a bit to see how easy it was to do. SO, this afternoon, I took several very short videos of my apartment, and put them together for a tour. And that's what's below. remember, this is the first time I ever fooled around with this stuff, so keep the primitiveness and inexperience-ness in mind. And don't judge me.



Now, I've got to get to work on mom's birthday project!

POLT Listening to "Got To Give It Up" by Marvin Gaye

I have kissed boys. Anybody above the waise it fair game. - Pete Wentz, Fall Out Boy

You're wantin' my body, I don't mind (Part 131)...

MONDAY'S HOT SHIRTLESS GUY PHOTOS

This week's theme is Pierced! Every guy here has at least one nipple pierced...and some much more than that.











POLT Listening to "Hate To Say I Told You So" by The Hives Oil: 89.24 (-1.51); Gas: 3.01 (-.02)

Hey, Cameron. You realize if we played by the rules right now we'd be in gym? - Ferris, Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Have you ever laid in a field of clover late into the night...

This past weekend I saw Cloverfield.

I saw it with the lovely, and pregnant, Mrs. A Local Celebrity, Mr. David Parispeking.


It went a bit better this time than when we went to see Walk Hard a few weeks ago...at least this time she had the cash to get inside. But that's another story altogether....

Cloverfield. Loved. It.

It was not anywhere near as gory as people had said. It was not anywhere near as scary as people had said. I did not get sick off the handhald camera work. And I thoroughly enjoyed myself.

Two complaints (possibly spoilers involved): the main characters actions were imminently STUPID! "we have to go directly into the area where the monster destorying the city is at right now...destroying the city, because I love her!" oh please. "Oh she's probably dead already, and i'm not at all sure I can get there with the monster and the military and all, and even I do, i probably won't be able to do anything to help her, but I have to go because I love her!" Gah. barf. Course, if they HADN'T gone that way, well, there probably wouldn't have been much of a movie to begin with, eh?

(which leads to another minor quibble...the damn thing is only like an hour and 15 minutes long or something! Course, the more I thought about it, it probably was a good time limit, any more might have been stretching things)

Second complaint: the chick has been laying there for, what, hours, with rebar in her shoulder. It takes everything they have, plus a hefty, horrible scream to lift her off of it. but yet, ten minutes later, she's running full speed through the street, dodging things, and stuff, her arm working fine.

I had an issue with the main character's cellphone as well, but A Local Celebrity, Mr. David Parispeking cleared that up for me earlier this evening.

Other than that, I have no quibble with the movie. I was thoroughly entertained. And I would recommend it to anyone thinking of seeing it. If you DO go, just make sure you sit all the way through the credits...all 12 minutes of them. There's a little snippet afterwords you probably wanna be there for.

POLT Listening to "Come Into My World" by Kylie Minogue

"How the hell do you know when we were having intimate relations?" "There is no one on Deck 12, Section 9 who does not know when you are having intimate relations." - Seven Of Nine, Star Trek: Voyager

Ghost town, used to be my city...

Hey kids, I found this website called myminicity, or some such junk. Apprantly, every time, once a day, that someone visits MY city, it gains a new resident, and the population increases, and buildings increase and roads grows, and businesses pop up, and before you know it you've got a large city, with hopefully a vibrant gay ghetto.

Or something like that, I'm not sure I totally understand it all myself. The revenues are all in Euros, and I think it's originally a French thing, so that might explaing the confusing nature of it all.

Nonetheless, if you guys could just take a second out of your days, for the next few days, and stop by Poltsylvania, just for a visit, and we'll see how much it increases and changes and stuff.

Yeah, I know, the excitement I offer you guys is nearly mind-blowing, but play along with me for a few days, wouldja? Just so i can see what, if anything, develops. Thanks!

POLT Listening to the "Folsom Prison Blues" by Johnny Cash

Does that actually work on college girls? Because for me, bad frat boy pick-up lines just make me think you're a pussy. - Vixen, JLA #7

That's you're style of being gay...

I was having a conversation recently about the state of being gay. I don't pretend to be an expert on all things gay-in general. but I think I AM an expert on all things gay relating to me. So I give the following explanation.

I think "gay", or "straight" for that matter, really has little to do with sex. Or not as much as people would like to think. Most straight men think of gay sex as: two girls (SEXY) or two guys (sickening), because all they think of is the sexual aspect.

As I sit here typing this, I am gay. And I'm not having sex with anyone at the moment. Not even myself. And I'm still gay.

If I never have sex with anyone else for the rest of my life, I will still be gay. If I have sex with a woman, or women, I will still be gay. It's not about the sex, totally. It's about how I feel about the other person...during sex, yes, but when not having sex.

Let me try it this way: I have sex with many different people, men and women (lots MORE ment than women, to be fair), but each time, the ACT of sex was a physical thing. A damn NICE physical thing, but a physical thing nonetheless. There have been people that I've had sex with who i just met, people who's names I don't know, and in fact, I'm pretty certain, a few people who didn't even speak English (and when I say "people", I generally mean "guys in Toronto"). And therefore, I had no emotional connection to them.

But, there have been people that I have been with that I loved, and had a deep emotional connection to, most recently Freddie, and that made the sex much MUCH better. Much more than a physical thing, because of the emotional aspect.

If I were to have sex with a women, as I have in the past, I would most likely not be thinking about them, but about thier brothers, or a friend, or a co-worker, or a porn scene, or something like that. Because while I can physically have sex with a woman, it jsut doesn't, for whatever reason, give me as much pleasure as does sex with men. So that, when I have sex with women, I generally am thinking about men.

On the flip side, I believe that straight people can have sex with someone the same sex and not be gay. If a guy slips his cock through a hole and gets a blowjob from someone on the other side, or if he's blindfolded and then given a blow job, he won't necessarily know what sex the person is doing the blowing. And there is something called "Situational Homosexuality" wherein self identified straight people (usually men) are put into situations without females available, like jail, boarding schoools, and previously, the military. And so, they have sex with each other. They're not gay before they enter the situation, aren't gay after the situation, and don't consider themselves gay while doing it. And there's the phenomenon of the "down low" where straight black guys have fulfilling sexlives with wives or girlfriends, but have sex with other men on the side. They don't, as I understand it, consider themselves gay either. But I'm not totally familiar with the "down low" so there could be more involved.

My point is, I dont believe being gay, or straight for that matter, is all about sex.

I get a deeper emotional feeling, a satisfaction, a contended feeling, LOVE, from being with a man that i have feelings for than with a woman. It's just the way I am. That's, in my mind, what makes me gay. Whatever sex you have that deeper, emotional feeling for is the sex you are attracted to, regardless of your sex.

And I don't believe this is a conscious choice. I know for a fact I never woke up one morning and thought, "Gee, I think I'll like men more than women." It's more like how I like vanilla ice cream better than chocolate. It's just the way I prefer things. And I certainly can eat chocolate, but I prefer vanilla. And I never woke up one morning and decided I was going to like vanilla more than chocolate, I just always have. (course, this whole chocolate/vanilla metaphor could be misinterpreted as a choice...not how i meant it, kiddies, NOT how I meant it.)

And that, kids, is Uncle Polt's post on being gay.

POLT Listening to "Aura" by the Church Oil: 90.75 (+.04); Gas: 3.03 (-.01)

"Basil, what are you doing?" "Kissing you, dear." "Well, don't." - Sybil, Fawlty Towers

Let's get unconscious, honey (Part 84)...

Unconscious Mutterings

These come from http://subliminal.lunanina.com/

(couldn't sleep...thought I'd get a jump on this)

I say ... and you think ... ?

Booze :: Liquor
Counter :: Cabinet
Action :: Movement
Trial :: Lawyer
Wheelchair :: Cripple
1-800 :: Toll Free
Chop :: Sticks
Relatives :: Old
Bed sheets :: Clean smell
Funnel :: Slide

POLT Listening to "Run Like Hell" by Pink Floyd

You look beautiful. Like hell. Like beautiful hell. - Pablo, Metrosexuality

I missed the opportunity, to get you, babe.....

As I looked into his eyes, I came to realize,
It could never be.
This had happened once before, that I had realized this,
But that didn't lessen the sting.
I saw it in his eyes, he wanted it.
I knew he saw in my eyes, how much I wanted it.
But time and place and circumstance,
All conspired against us.
"Maybe sometime soon", I offered.
"Yeah, later", he concurred.
But I think we both knew the truth.
We had, what we had, right then,
and nothing else.
And right then, what we had, while not long,
and teasingly, temptingly, anxiously insufficient,
was but a taste of what could have been.
And we both knew it.
The kisses too short. The touches too furtive,
and yet too rushed.
Oh, the thoughts, visions of what might have been,
they inflict pain. And frustration.
Damn Fate! Or Karma! Or Kismet! Or the Cosmos!
Whatever. Fuck 'em all.

POLT Listening to "Bad Dream" by Keane

What matters in finding the right person is to find the person who's going to Jungle Fuck you until the day you die! - Stephanie Hodge

My baby's got a secret (Part 59)...

Secret Saturdays

POLT Listening to "When Dove's Cry" by Quindon Tarver Oil: 90.71 (-.04); Gas: 3.04 (-.01)

Thinking is overrated. You gotta DO! - Kid Flash, Teen Titans #50

Some boys kiss me, some boys hug me (Part 116)...

Frenching Fridays

POLT Listening to "Unique" by Club 69

"Satchel, did you eat the remote?" "I borrowed it internally, yes." - Satchel, Get Fuzzy

Whoever he was, he had it tucked under...

I hate pooping in a toilet not my own. Especially public toilets. Hate ‘em. Unfortunately, with the diabetic medication I’m taking, I have to go frequently, like 2-3 times a day. And when the urge strikes, when my colon says to me, "Uncle Polt, we are done with this, get rid of it." There’s not a whole lot of time available before they get rid of it. Oh, Mr. Sphincter will try to keep it contained, but generally, when nature calls to me, I don’t have a whole lot of time available before I must answer the call.

This has forced me to, against my better wishes, used public toilets. I can still remember one of the first times I had to. I was working at a drug store, roughly 20 years ago or so. We had closed for the night. The manager was wrapping up the paperwork, I was finishing stacking shelves. And I had to go. I’m not sure what I ate, or why it happened like this, but I HAD to use the bathroom.

The bathroom in the drugstore was not a public toilet, and there were only about four males employees working there anyway, so I figured it wouldn’t be too bad. SO I went in, lowered my pants and underwear to my ankles and sat down.

Now I was still living at home then, and every toilet seat that we had ever had was of the oval, elongated donut type shape. When I needed to go, I’d sit, and then tuck…Lil Polt down in between my legs, lodging it there against the seat’s rim. Guys, you know what I’m talking about, right? Ladies, well, just take me at my word, okay?

So, anyway, there I am sitting in the drugstore toilet. And I after the first…expulsion, I have the need to release some…urine as well. As you do. And so I do…and only afterwards do I realize this toilet seat is not ovally donut shaped, but rather is more "u" shaped. In other words, open at the front end. In other words, there’s nothing there to keep Lil Polt pointing downwards.

And so….I piss a nice stream of urine out over my pants and underwear and drench a goodly portion of the inside of my leg….which then runs down my leg into my socks and shoe. My underwear and sock actually caught the brunt of it. When I was finished with my business (making sure I kept Lil Polt tucked downwards with my hand), I cleaned off my leg pretty easily. The underwear were a total mess though, so I took them off, wrapped them in a bunch of paper towels and threw them in the trash. And I tried to wipe off my pants as best I could, but when I pulled them up, there were still several wet spots on them touching my skin. And since we left the store rather soon thereafter, and since it was cold outside, it was a somewhat chilling walk back home.

All this came to mind as I was sitting on the toilet at work, for the second time of the day, holding Lil Polt down. Funny, the things you think of whilst on...downtime, eh?

POLT Listening to "Sex On Wheels" by My Life With The Thrill Kill Cult Oil: 90.75 (+1.03); Gas: 3.05 (-.03)

Mel Gibson is purchasing a private island in Fiji for $15 million dollars. Not having and Jews around: Priceless. - Tina Fey, Weekend Update, SNL

He's serving you drinks, he's dishing up smiles...

Man have I been going to the wrong clubs!!!!



And all these years, I always asked for my drinks in a glass. What the HELL was I thinking???

POLT Listening to "It's A Fine Day" by Miss Jane Oil: 89-72 (+1.95); Gas: 3.08 (-.01)

If you really want to hurt your parents and you don't have nerve enough to be homosexual, the least you can do is go into the arts. - Kurt Vonnegut

Undress me, will I look like a fool (Part 93)...

Once more, kids, it's time for....


My parents added a room onto the back of the house two years ago. Mom has it decorated in purple, which makes it my favorite room in the house. I was over there over the summer, and got this shot of my feet and lower legs on the purple carpet.


Mmmm, can't you just FEEL the lush purplish comfort of the rug????

To see what other people put up, click Here.

POLT Listening to "Goodbye Horses" by Psyche

I like driving at night better because you don't have to be so perfect and stay between the lines. - a teenaged driver

Victoria's gone forever only memories remain...

(This part was typed during the commercial break before they announced the winners)

This week's episode proved once more that I have no fashion sense because I LOVED Chris Marsh's "little blue dress" and thought that Christian's outfit looked....thrown together, hodge-podge and futuristic...in a future where there's been a nuclear apocolypse. Blech.

I did however very much like Sweet P's dress, and Rami's use of zippers was very imaginative. Ricky's dress was just kinda "meh" to me, but at least he had a runway semi-breakdown, so that made it okay.

I think Victorya's garment was boring and drab and unimaginative. She needs to go. Now I need to turn around and see who actually get auf-ed.

(watching the results)

I think there were better garments up there than Ricky's, but the look on Christian's face when Ricky was announced the winner made it all worth it. Victorya goes home. ( I threw my arms in air and cheered when they said Jillian was in) Well done, judges, well done.




POLT Listening to "All These Things That I've Done" by The Killers

I was a prisoner too, but for bad reasons. - Bushie to Argentine president Nestor Kirchner, on being told that all but one of the Argentine delegates to a summit meeting were imprisoned during the military dictatorship, Jan 13, 2004