Take it to the runway (Part 17)...

"A Little Bit Of Fashion"



(I got nothing from Dave S. or Chazz overnight, so this will be a solo review. If they send me anything, I'll update the post with their comments!)

Make a look for a little girl and then, surprise, make a complimentary look for a model!

Just some observations first:

Jonathan's scared of children? really? He did finally shine this episode, he came out of the woodwork and developed a personality.
A dog at Mood??? I LOVE Mood!!!
"If I was a little girl, I would wear green." - Anthony
Ben and Jay using purple, Jesse and Emilio wearing purple! This could possibly be my favorite episode ever!
Jay in white short-shorts? Yes please!
Tim says - "You're rockin' Halloween" and "Stop the show or clown clothes!"

The looks:
Anthony: I don't think they're compatable, but they're well made
Amy: Looks sloppily made, girl's looks thrown together
Ben: Don't see them as compatable, but well made
Seth Aaron: Matched, looks good but a bit out there
Jesse: Like it all around, chic
Jonathan: Too many ruffles
Maya: Nicely matched, looks good
Mila: Works together but too 60's-ish
Emilo: Love it! Both extremely well made, could see them at a wedding
Janeane: Matches kinda but very drab and boring
Jay: Matching ruffles are awesome, nice look

My top three: Emilio, as the winner, Jesse & Jay
My bottom three: Janeane, as the loser, Amy, Mila

I think the judges were way off on the winner. I thought Seth Aaron's girl's dress was do-able, but the model's one just seemed too..gimmicky. I totally agreed that Janeane needed to go.

Next week, we have Hardware, screaming, hammering, cheesefests, and dirty vacuum bags. Sounds like any Saturday night around Casa de Polt! Be-da-DUM!

POLT

Take it to the runway (Part 16)...

"Run For Cover"

Now with added Chazz!

I missed last week's episode although I've been told poor, sweet, cute, I-dont-listen-to-Tim Jesse was aufed. So here is the photo that would have accompanied last week's post, if I had posted it.


And now, onto this week's episode:

Shirtless Seth Aaron? NO! Jesse with a line of facial stubble? Yes please!
Ben, the colors...I hope they don't come out garish.
Jonathan's hair is much better as a fauxhawk than combed down.
Mila, arrogant much? Perhaps that's why no one congratulated you last time.
Why are Mila and Janeane wearing the same yellow/black/white splotched top?

Now, the runway:
Amy: a floppy mess
Seth Aaron: Disappointingly, I really like it.
Jesse: A corset? Not sure, but it's okay.
Anna: Not cohesive at ALL.
Anthony: Messy, looks amateurish
Janeane: Ok, but bland colored.
Mila: Too short, the bottom arrow looks like it's emphasizing her hootchie
Emilo: Looks like a nightie, but ok.
Jay: Train too long and flowing, not sure.
Jonathan: 1970's Farrah Fawcett, nononono
Maya: Not keen on the collar but okay overall
Ben: Like it. Not garish at all, the colors work.

My top three: Seth Aaron, Maya, Ben, with Ben as the winner
My bottom three: Anna, Anthony, Amy, with Anna going home

The judges choices: Anthony wins, Anna leaves. At least I had one correct, but man was I far off on the winner. It was asymmetrical and looked almost unfinished. Clearly, I'm not meant to work in fashion.

And now for Dave S.'s take:

Okay, Mila, you're starting to get on my nerves. How can you possibly whine, "Why don't they like me?" and then turn around a minute later and be all "I'm wonderful and everyone else sucks!" While you're designing that bland, colorless dress why not take a quick break and get a snack out of the clue machine?

And what the hell was in Anna's head when she came up with that three-piece disco costume? Good lord. It's not Teen People that's Heidi's going to be on the cover of.

Okay, so I moderately agree with the top and bottom groups that the judges chose. Though I absolutely hated Amy's flowery-patterned gross-fest, highlighted by a massive strange coursage stuck to the shoulder like a giant gay hissing cockroach. Yuck.

Anna, goodbye. You're a nice girl, but you're way out of your league at this point. The judges made the right choice.

But Anthony as the winner??? Really? The dress was a nice concept, but the execution sucked. It was a mess of layers that were laying all wrong. Ben's was by far more compelling and beautifully done. The judges definitely got it wrong this time.

And for a younger perspective, Chazz:

Anthony's dress was boring boring boring! Maybe Heidi's just getting more dull with each child she has, because Emilio's dress was far more striking. And Anna got kicked off? Who's Anna?


Glad to see we all three agreed on Anthony's dress. And Chazz's Anna comment made me laugh out loud! Thanks guys. Next week we have little girls, Romper Room on crack and cheap mall outfits.

POLT Listening to "Starlight" by Muse

Each person should walk away from sex satisfied - and if it was really good, at least one person should be limping. - Jason Davis, XY #21

Take it to the runway (Part 15)...

"The Hi's And Lows Of Fashion"

Now, with added Chazz!

Thank GOD almighty, we're free at last! Ping went home, and she didn't drag poor adorable Jesse with her!

I did not like Mila's outfit. I mean it wasn't horrible or anything, there were several worse than that. It looked like a sports outfit, something a grandmother might wear. My favorite was...I forgot to write it down, but it was a grey dress, form fitted very nicely done.

Unfortunately, I was doing something else as I was watching this, so I have no notes or anything, and this is all I got. I'll turn it over to Dave S.:

Ping Ping Ping. Why must you torment my Jesse with your inept sewing skills and your bizarre and inefficient design process? Oh, how I lament Jesse's inability to successfully bash you in the creative skull.

Oh, wait. I guess the judges decided to do that for him.

Nothing on the runway tonight was outstanding. Mila's outfit was clever and somewhat sheik and so I guess it should've won, but I wasn't all freakin' gaga over it or anything. But I didn't really hate anything either. Though my least favorite was probably Jesus and Amy's patchwork monstrosity. And the cheaper dresses were all pretty awful. I don't think I liked a single one.

Though the worst of the cheap dresses was definitely Ping and Jesse's. They spent $50 on that? I think I could've found it for $5.99 at the thrift store down the street.

Sorry, Jesse! Loveyoumeanit, but that was just yuck. But luckily you survived and Ping didn't!
Yaaaayyy!!

And now we hear a younger opinion, as Dave S.'s son Chazz (I know it's spelled with only one Z, but two Z's are snazzier!):

Chaz: Ping's a creatively stuck-up bitch. Go home already!!! Go back to wherever you live and be "eccentric" there and spare us from it on our weekly runway!

Short, sweet, and oh so accurate! Glad to have you aboard, Chazzman!

And next week, meltdowns of Chernobyl porportions, everyone's freaking out and good bosoms.

POLT Listening to "Heat Of The Moment" by Asia

That's what the Internet is for, slandering people anonymously. - Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back

Take it to the runway (Part 14)...

Bringing back an old favorite, I give you....


First a shot of all the new designers:

Minus the first one (thankfully) kicked off:

Okay, since I didn't get a chance to do this last week, I'm going to offer some opinions on the designers:

Anthony: Flaming (hell, he's an conflagration!), but do-able.
Ben: Cute, despite the nose.
Emilo: Not cute, but not Quasimodo either.
Jay: Asianly cute.
Jesse: Cute in a Christian Bale kinda way.
Jesus: Divinely cute.
Jonathan: Stubblyish cute-ish.
Seth Aaron: No. No, no. No. Gotta stop dressing like he's 20 years younger than he is.

And now, onto the show: "The Fashion Farm" Make an outfit out of a burlap sack.

Okay, my three favorite dresses were by Amy, Mila and surprisingly by Janeane as well. my favorite was Mila's. I'm not at all bothered by the judge's decision, cause Jay's dress really did look good with the feathery-ness of it.

My three least favorite were Ping ("ass flap" and saddlebags), Seth Aaron (a hoddy? Really? And was that a lamp shade he had on her as a skirt?) and Pamela (Looked a little bland to me). My least favorite was Ping's. I wasn't terribly upset at the judges decision, although I thought Ping's was worse and I Pamela seemed like a nice person.

And now, onto Dave S.'s comments:

Okay, Ping is just about on my last nerve. She just comes off as arrogant. Yuck. And her design sucked pondwater bigtime.

Jesse on the other hand is hot.

That's all. He's just, y'know...hot. I don't even remember what he designed this week. :-P

Okay, skipping the minimal drama, which isn't even worth mentioning, I gotta move to the runway. The judges for once seemed to pick the right ones for the top three. I felt Amy's was the best. I felt it answered the challenge the best -- there was no disguising of the burlap, no fancy extra things to distract from the fact that it was a basic fabric she built it out of. Yet it was stunning. Sure, Mila and Jae created great dresses, but Amy's was the most bold. The one that took the biggest risk (amongst the top three anyway). But in the end Jae won, and I wasn't hugely disappointed or surprised. His was pretty sweet.

But the bottom three were definitely bottom three. Yuck. Ping's was just awful. Easily the ugliest design I have ever seen on Project Runway. Good lord, *Cher* wouldn't have worn that thing. It was hideous. And I tire of her. I'm *already* upset about next week's episode where her and Jesse are shown working together. Or trying. Because she certainly wouldn't want to do things like someone else! Heaven's no! Compromise in order to successfully work with another designer that may do things in an organized and designerly way? Egad! Because she's "different," you know. She thinks about things on "a different level". Whatever. Get over yourself. And next week, you better not fuck with my Jesse, bitch.

Where was I...? Oh, right. Yeah. Jesus stayed and Pamela got booted. Which was a complete shock. I was completely expecting Jesus to get Heidi's 5-inch heals planted firmly in his little behind as he went sailing out the PR door. But no, it was Pamela and her yucky-butted monstrosity. Though it was a *hell* of a lot better than Ping's. Ping's was by far the worst on the runway.

Oh, and is it just me, or is Tim Gunn getting a bit sassy this season? Love it!

And I'll finish by saying I am in total and completel agreement with Dave S. and his assessment of Jesse.

POLT Listening to "No Excuses" by Alice In Chains

"Most sinners are in denial." "I am NOT in denial!" "See what I mean?" - Eddie, Teen Titans #35

Tired and going to bed, but a quick Project Runway post.

Once more, my likes and dislikes are the polar opposites of the judges. I DETESTED Ping's...thing. I also didn't like Seth Aaron's at all! I did like Jesus's evening gown. I liked Anthony although I hated his dress, he's funny!

Thank GOD, the black chick went home. Her arrogance turned me off entirely. And Jesus was too cute to go the first week. I think the Asian guy's pretty cute too (d'uh), and the guy that was the pirate in his other job and wore the beret throughout the show. So they're my favorites to win.

I kid, I KID! I just want them to hang around for a bit so I can look at them some more. I don't have a favorite yet.

What did YOU think about the show?

POLT

PS
"Models Of The Runway"? No thank you. Listening to vapid size zero's whine about how rough their lifes are? Sorry, I got more important things to do. like sleep. Nite all.

Make it work...

Anyone who loves Project Runway, and politics, as much as I do, MUST go HERE! It's Tim Gunn, reviewing the Presidential figures in this year's contests. And he does it in classic Tim Gunn style.

About Sarah Palin's one outfit he says, "The boot! What's with that boot?" "Is it Vice-Presidential candidate-a-go-go?" "I fundamentally don't understand it." I'm with ya, brother. But he takes on her, Chelsea, Hillary, McCain, Cindy, Obama, Michelle, Joe Biden, he's takes on them all.

Credit to Stephen for posting the link on his blog first.

POLT Listening to "Diesel Power" by the Prodigy Oil: 63.81 (-3.67); Gas: 2.46 (-.03)
RealClearPolitics Poll Averages: Obama +7.4
"He's a heterophobe" "It's true, he is." "It's true, I am." - Brian, Queer As Folk

Take it to the Runway (Part 13)...

Once more it's time for...

A Project Runway Rundown from a gay man's and a straight man's perspectives

Before we begin, I need to tell you all that Dave S. is going it alone again tonight. Tonight is not only the finale of Project Runway, but also the final presidential debate. And I wrangled with this decision, going back and forth, not sure which one I'd want to watch. Ultimately, it came down to this: 1) They'll show repeatedly, ad nauseum, the PR finale; 2) Even though I think, from what I've seen, Leannimal will have the best, most coherent, most cohesive collection, I'm positive Kenley's gonna win this thing. The judges seem to go for wild (see Christian last season, Jeffrey the season before, and Jay with those freaky boots on every model in the first season) instead of clothes that are actually wearable. In addition, the producers have kept Kenley on at least three times when she should have been sent home, so there must be some reason; and 3) I really wanna see if McCain's gonna stroke out or something. They'll be seated, so unfortunately, he can't wander the stage like a lost retirement home resident, but still, he could just go off.

I've typed all this up at roughly 7:30, well before either one. And I dearly hope my prediction for Kenley is wrong. But we'll all know soon enough. now, without further ado, I give you...Dave S.!

Finale, Part 2

Overall, this was not a dramatic episode. No major outbursts, no big blow-ups. But it was definitely interesting. And the judging twist, which was brilliant.

We hit the designers with only three days before the runway show.

First, the model casting. Nothing overly interesting here, just Kenley being Kenley and Leanne getting mildly annoyed with her.

Tim reviewed the collections with the designers and after a bit of an altercation with Kenley believing the judges were nearly off their rocker saying her wedding dress was a knock-off, he actually rolled his eyes behind her back. Seriously. It was priceless.

Korto decides to ditch a dress or two -- including her wedding dress -- and needs to come up with two completely new dresses. Crazy. But will she be able to pull it off? It eventually throws her into a bit of a panic, and rightfully so. Kenley makes the point that the judges are going to rate on craftsmanship -- and Korto can't possibly make two clean garments in such a short time.

And I think she's right.

Leanne comments that Kenley's designs look very Holly Hobby. And I think *she's* right.
There's a great interlude where one of Leanne's models brings a little dog with her to her fitting. After she's in the dress, it poops and -- while in the dress -- has to clean up the doody. Leanne: "Just don't get it on the dress!" Hilarious.

As they're backstage for the final runway show in front of a packed crowd, I worry for Leanne -- Korto's collection looks like it came together really well. She's done some great work.

And one of Leanne's outfits no longer fits the model! Apparently it was over-steamed and is now stretched out. She has to swap models and outfits in hopes that it'll fit better.

Now here's the cool part. It's the beginning of the show and Heidi comes out to get it all started. She announces that Jennifer Lopez was supposed to be one of the judges, but she injured her foot and couldn't be there. So who does she announce as the fourth judge? Tim Gunn!! Seriously. That's awesomeness times twelve!

Kenley's comment when she finds out: "Maybe I should've had a better attitude..."

Okay, so here's the runway rundown:

Kenley:
I really like the painted fabrics, but her collection lacked any cohesion. Several of the garments were a bit too simple and relied almost entirely on her skill at fabric painting. She exhibited a great black dinner dress though, and had a beautiful white dress with a line of painted flowers running up the front and curling around the top. The winner of her collection was a great top/skirt combo with a very nice green, pillowy top and a nice, clean black silk skirt.

Korto:
Her collection had a definite cohesion. She had some great colors -- though not complex -- that really showed off her designs. I wasn't a fan of the metallic browns that she used on several of the outfits, though. She displayed a short-skirted green dress that was awesome, as well as a white pantsuit that was very well done. I was mostly taken by her ability to so effectively use asymmetry in her work. Overall very very nice. And she walked her daughter down the runway with her, which I thought was awesome.

Leanne:
Leanne's craftsmanship is simply impeccable. Everything flows just right and fits perfectly. This was more of what we saw last week -- the layers of fabric inspired by water. But she nails it. Hers is the most cohesive of all of the PR designers. It screams Leanne and really works together beautifully. The wedding dress is largely unchanged, but still amazing. Her standout piece was an absolutely incredible top/pant combo that was stunning. She had only one top that I didn't think worked real well, but overall, she did some really amazing work.
Then came the judging. All the judges were taken by their work and all of them had some minor critiques. They thought that Kenley needed to do some research to make sure her designs hadn't been done before (their ongoing "knock-off" concerns). And they worried that Leanne would be a one-hit wonder.

But in the end, it was Leanne who they decided should be the Project Runway winner! Woohoo! And I (of course) think they got it right. I was worried, though -- I thought Korto's designs were very good, but Leanne's were overall very stunning.

So there you have it. The end of Season 5. Not as much of a rollercoaster as previous seasons perhaps, but just as engaging.

(raise your glasses!) Here's to Season 6!




Hmm, well it seems my guess was off. I'm sorry I missed all the Tim Gunn-ness (woulda loved to see the eye roll and Kenley's response to him being a judge). I'm pleased with the outcome as well. Way to go, Leannimal!

I want to thank Dave S. for handling this alone again. This mighta been more interesting than the debate. I'll have a review of that in the next few days. And if they have a Season 6, well, I hope Dave S. agrees to do this again. From the very beginning this time!

And remember everyone, always "Make It Work!"

POLT Listening to "That's Not My Name" by The Ting-Tings

I'm worse than scum, I'm...um, what's worse than scum? - Emmett, Queer As Folk

Take it runway (Part 12)...

Once more it's time for...

A Project Runway Rundown from a gay man's and a straight man's perspectives

Finale, Part 1

Wedding dresses! They need to do wedding dresses?? Ugh.
So the designers are sent home to design their lines. Korto to Little Rock, Leanne to Portland, Jerell to LA, and Kenley to Brooklyn.

Tim visits each one, as he always does. First is Korto.
Tim's thrilled to be in Arkansas? I'm pretty sure this is his first, and probably last, trip to Arkansas.
My initial feel is that I like her designs. Nice colors, nice shapes. A bit simple, but it might be just enough to get her to Fashion Week.
I like the wedding dress, at least what she's got done of it. Have to see the final thing though to be sure.
And she has a beautiful family story of going against the odds and getting to where she's at. Her family had it tough and they persevered. Inspiring.
Yes, Tim meets her family, her friends (STAR!) and gets a drum performance.

Next up is Leanne. D'oh! She has a boyfriend. I gotta get them broken up. Her beau seems to match her perfectly, though. Dammit.
Yeah, when they showed Nathan, my first two thoughts were, in this order: 1) damn, he's cute, and 2) poor Dave S.
She has a beautiful line going. She's going for a water/wave look and it works on all levels. Really nice work. And I'm not saying that because I think she should win. This is really nice work. And she still has weeks to work on it.
I like the wave motif as well. And with the designs we've seen from her before, she could really pull this off.
And then, she takes Tim on a bicycle ride for two!

Commercial break: Jack looks DAMN hot in his Saturn-inspired design. But then, of course, he would. In anything, really. back to the show.

Jerell is next on Tim's visits. Everything seems to be a bit messy. A bit too many fabrics tossed together. I bit too many accessaries, perhaps. Tim voices his concerns too, but Jerell seems to not want to pay attention. That worries me.
I thought his dress was tissue paper...crumpled tissue paper. I too noted how he ignored Tim's advice. Don't there designers watch the previous season of this show??? You ALWAYS listen to Tim!!!
And as for Jerell's 'love interest', all I can say is Leannimal's boyfriend was much cuter. And so was the black guy in the wife-beater in Jerell's apartment too.

Kenley is Tim's last stop, a mere two and a half weeks prior to Fashion Week. Her wedding dress is absolutely gorgeous. And the hand-painted fabrics are beautiful. I'll be damned if she doesn't actually have a chance...
Ropes...as a choker? And the Wedding dress...I must have NO fashion sense, Dave S., cause all I'm seeing is Big Bird. Who wants feathers like that on a wedding dress???

So they make it back to NYC.
And they're staying in a Presidential Suite. SCHWEET! And on Times Square. I aspire to one day be rich enough to at least glimpse the place in real life. I'll never make enough to actually stay there. But moving on....

Was there even a shred of sincerity in Kenley's giggling, over-the-shoulder 'apology' for being a bitch? But by the same token, was there any sincerity in Korto's toast to good luck?

Tim breaks it to them that they have one more challenge: To create a bridesmaid's dress that goes with the wedding gown that they were told should already be a part of their Fashion Week collection. It's going to be what the judges use to determine who goes to the final three.
Ooooh, popping this on them at the last minute...nasty.

Leanne's bridemaid's dress is a knockout and it's not even finished yet. Jerell's is still a mess, as well as Korto's. Kenley's seems like it might be a bit boring.
I reserved comment on the bridesmaids gowns until seeing them on the runway.

Tim gives them a pep talk, but ends up crying about not wanting to see any of them be eliminated at this point. It makes me want to cry too for some bizarre reason...
Awwww, Dave S., you old softy. I was too taken aback that the stone facade that IS Tim Gunn actually cracked a bit and allowed this true emotion to come through. Nice.

And this is my meager moment of hotness: Seeing Leanne with wet hair, just out of the shower. ::shudder:: Pathetic ecstasy, I know, but, hey, Polt's had all sorts of moments with Jerell...
Hehehehe....yeah, and not ONE single Jerell junk crotchshot this week either.

So it's on to the runway...
But, wait, I gotta say that Leanne's glasses are *so* majorly sexy...
*SIGH*....Dave S., I like Leannimal, and I think she's kinda...cute. But seriously, everytime I see her, I see dowdy librarian lady. Oh well, different strokes, ya know? :)

Jerell:
The wedding dress still seems a bit messy. Did he not listen to Tim?
The bridemaid's dress isn't much better. I'm worried for Jerell.
Sloppy and Messy look to them, although that's probably the fabric. What the HELL are those flowers sticking outta her head. honestly, I liked the bridesmaid better than the bride.

Kenley:
Her wedding dress is still beautiful. The layers of feathery stuff looks great.
Her bridesmaid's dress looks kind of plain, though I like how the skirt matches the feel of the accompanying wedding dress.
Dude, I am SO not getting it. I see a big bird feathered wedding dress in white and off white, and then I see a too short poofy blue bridesmaids gown. I see no coherence between the two, I see no connection at ALL. If these are to be worn at a wedding, God forbid, then they're from two different weddings.

Korto:
Ugh. The wedding dress looks too overworked and the colors are kinda ugly.
The bridesmaid dress looks nice, but only matches the wedding dress in that the color scheme is similar. I'm worried for Korto as well.
Messy bride dress again. And WAY overworked. The color scheme is the same on both, but that's about it for coherent.

Leanne:
Gorgeous work on the wedding dress. The flow of layers is great and it has a nice overall feel.
And her bridesmaid's dress is a near-perfect match. Slightly different in color, but pulls in the right elements to make it match the wedding dress. Great work.
I gotta be honest, I do not like the wedding gown much. It's not at all a bad dress, and it's expertly made. And the wave motif looks great too. but I don't like the....poofiness of the middle, where the waves are. It seems out of place with the rest of the dress. the bridesmaid, however, is outSTANDing. Carries the motif through, is a beatiful shade of blue. Just gorgeous.

The judges praise both Leanne and Kenley -- and rightfully so-- but have a problem with both Korto and Jerell. Jerell they say is pulling in too many elements and it seems (surprise!) messy. Korto's dresses are too overworked and are a bit too complicated. Plus, her palette is a bit dull for a wedding party and they don't match up well enough to each other.
Right away they declare Leanne and Kenley as in. And Jerell and Korto as the bottom two. This is a fair judgement in my opinion. Both didn't put out their best work here.
Ultimately, they push out Jerell, placing Leanne, Kenley and Korto in the top three.
Though it was a toss-up, I think they sent the right person home.
As much as I would've liked to see Kenley pushed out, she did have a nice design, while both Jerell and Korto fell a little flat. Personally, I think they made the right decision.

I thought Leannimal had the best pair of designs by a mile.
I thought Kenley's was the worst because the stark differences between the gowns. I could see both Jerell's and Korto's dresses together in the same wedding. Not at all for Kenley's. And honestly, as short as her dress was...that's a going out to party, get drunk and get fucked dress. It's not for a semi-formal/formal situation like a wedding.
For that reason, I thought Kenley should be booted. But I knew before they even said anything they weren't going to boot Kenley. I don't know why, but they seem bound and determined to keep moving her on, when in at least three challenges she should have gone home.

So since they're keeping her, I gotta say I'd send Jerell home. His was just plain messy, and even if it wasn't, those flowers-sprouting-from-the-head thing is reason enough for him to go. Not a good design at all. I don't think he was the right one to go, but when you remove Kenley from consideration, as the judges, or producers, have decided to do, then he was the one that had to go.

At this point, I can see Leanne winning it all. She had a cohesive line that completely communicated what she was aiming for. And it's a line that is beautiful.
I agree. I didn't see anything from the other two to match what she was doing. But remember, the producers like Kenley, so who knows what'll happen next week.




Next Week: Holly Hobby dresses, fashion week, missing models and scissors

POLT Listening to "Everybody's Changing" by Keane

The war, energy prices, the failure with Katrina...Republicans can't govern. - Democratic Representative Rahm Emmanuel, 2005

take it to the runway (Part 11)...

And away we go...

A Project Runway Rundown from a gay man's and a straight man's perspectives

Nature Calls

Okay, I don't know where to start. What a crazy night of Project Runway. I was major high-stress. Leanne not make it to Fashion Week? Major possibility. Hopefully this review makes sense, because in my anxiety, I probably had one too many glasses of wine...
Dude....you're stressing and getting all liquored up over a chick you've never met on a reality tv show? Man, and I thought I was obsessive....

First off, Kenley's all pissed at Leanne for not "selling" her dress on the runway last week. I don't think that even if she sold it, that anyone would buy it, honey. It was fugly. Really. Look at the tape. Laughable. Seriously. A pieced-together Walmart outfit all the way.
Totally with you on Kenley shifting the blame to Leannimal's 'working' of Kenley ridiculous outfit. But First Off for me was the review of last week, and yet another sweet view of Jerell's junk in Suede's zippered jeans on the runway. Yeah, okay, maybe I AM obsessive....anyways...

So, to the challenge! A field trip to the New York Botanical Garden. What a cool place. Very similar to Columbus's own Franklin Park Conservatory or our Whetstone Rose Garden. Beautiful place. Except with bees. Everywhere.
It did seem beautiful. That's probably because there weren't any New Yorkers or tourists walking around to ruin the ambiance.

Our designers were given the task of taking photos of potentially inspirational pieces of nature to create an evening gown. Interesting. I immediately thought of Keith -- he would've been a killer at this challenge.
Hmmm, I'd just like to see a bit of the Keith hunkiness one more time (yes, yes, obsessive, I know...) I like that Jerell's taking a LOT of purple pics! And the one he chose was mesmerisingly beautiful to me. Leannimal's taking a lot of purple plants as well, inbetween dodging the bees. Kenley's even checking out the fushias and the purples! Korto...well, she's gonna do it for her Mama...not in purple unfortunately.

When the designers get back from Mode where they buy their fabric, Kenley realizes that her tulle isn't with her stuff. D'oh! Both Korto and Jerell have tulle, but secretly say they're not giving it to Kenley. Kenley at one point even asks Jerell if he'd sell his tulle. I immediately thought: "Girl, if Jerell's tulle was for sale, Polt would've been at his side offering him cash." ;-)
BWAHAHAHHAAAHAHA!!! That is AWEsome! Awesomely funny! Awesomely funny, but eeriely true...

I want to point out something here. Right before the show, I get a text from Dave S., happy cause it's only an hour until Kenley goes home, or so he says. And then, after this episode he mentions above, I get another text from him saying, and I quote "She's goin' down. I mean, c'mon, she's such a tulle.". Bwahahahaha, Dave S., if I didn't love you before, I sure as hell do now!

And I have to admit, somewhat sheepingly, that I thought she was saying and talking about a "tool". I thought she had bought some kind of instrument at Mood to help her do something. I had no idea it was 'tulle' and that that was some kidna fabric until I saw the sub-titles. *SIGH*, well I have been called the 'straightest gay man' ever seen, so what do you expect? Anyway, back to the show.

Eventually, Tim allows Kenley to go back to Mode to pick up her tulle. Personally, I didn't even know what tulle was.
Oh good. See, I wrote that above before I read this. Glad to know I wasn't alone.

At one point, Kenley is all "I don't know why I'm always on the opposite side of the room (from the other three)." Um, yeah. You seriously don't know why?! A nano-second of introspection would give you your answer, Ken.
Seriously. Perhaps be a little less arrogant and smug and listen to your peers and Tim Gunn and maybe things would be a bit clearer for you in that department.

So they start building their dresses and I'm immediately worried about all of their designs. None are striking and Korto's and Jerrel's are a mess. Leanne is the only one that seems to have a decent design, but even with her's I'm worried. Tim seemed to think that Jerrel had some possbility of wowing the judges, but I didn't agree. There seemed to be no direction to it. Korto's looked like a bridesmaid's dress. And Kenley's just looked like a Saturday morning cartoon.
Yeah, I wrote down the following:
Tim and Korto are both worried about the lace.
Kenley loves her dress but Tim says fish scales, which Kenley loves, even though this is a flora challange and not a fauna one.
Jerell has the layers Tim loves...but it's looking unfinished.
Leannimal's says Hello Dolly!, but she knows what to do.
And yet, Tim's proud of them all. I truly think this was the first time I've ever seen Tim be insincere. Really.

Next day, Leannimal cries during an interview.
We have Jerell in sweat pants, Jerell in a towel, and Jerell in tears. Please, girl, get it together.
Korto too is crying in her interview.
And Kenley sheds tears like she exhales oxygen.

So, on to the runway...
Korto: Nice, but a bit dull. It still has a bridesmaid feel to it.
I thought it okay, but not striking. not her best work.
Leanne: Not bad. I like the flow of the gown and the bodice is nice. Great fit. That tuft of blue in the back is awful.
I love the way the bottom part flows, but I HATE the asymmetry of that sash thing. Hate it.
Jerrel: Stiff and ugly. No movement at all and it just seemed to be a mishmash. The bodice piece is just too low, making the model's boobs look either nonexistent or so low as to be competing with a grandmother who's suckled ten kids.
It looks very messy, incomplete. And it is way WAY too low cut. Does the model even HAVE tits? If she does, this dress is in no way flattering to them.
Kenley: Incredibly Hanna-Barbera. Cheesy. Though it fit incredibly well.
My first two thought were: Carmen Miranda, and drag queen portraying an purple mermaid thingee. Didn't like it a bit.

Absolutely none of these are a homerun. Not even close. Is this week 2? Because it's kinda looking that way.
I agree totally! I didn't like ANY of them. All of them had more things I didn't like than things I did. A big BIG disappointment.

On the runway:
Kenley argues with NINAGARCIA (never a good idea), cries at Michael Kors, sasses Heidi, snaps at Jerell.
My GOD, the tears...from ALL of them!! geez, I was looking for a life-preserver in case my living room flooded.

The real drama happened after the runway.
The scathing critique got Korto crying, Kenley crying foul, and Leanne perhaps crying inwardly, because she really didn't let much come to the surface.
(Polt, I'll let you assess the goings-on -- I think you'll do a *far* better job than I.)
Sorry, dude, I'm not gonna be much help here. Chicks in catfights are more the pervue of straight guys. Gay guys wanna calm them down and console them. If you noticed, during the verbal sparrings, both Jerell and Leannimal were kinda leaning off onto the arms of the couch, like they were afraid Kenley was coming up over that coffee table after Korto, or vice versa, and were ready to jump outta the way. Personally, I was expecting Steve from the Jerry Springer show to jump in off camera and interpose himself between them. Frankly, though, I felt uncomfortable, for both of them.

Kenley = indefensible bitch. Learn to take criticism, my whiney blameshifter, otherwise you'll go nowhere in this biz.
Kenley: "I wasn't going for elegant.." It's an *evening gown* -- if you weren't going for elegant, then how the hell did you think you would ever win the challenge?!
Yeah, that's what I was wondering at that quote. Even Heidi looked surprised, although whether that was over the comment or the fact she had been sasses, I don't know.

Ultimately, it was Jerrel that got the win from the judges. Personally, I don't think anyone should have won. None were even close to outstanding enough for this late in the competition.
Right after the showing of the dresses, I thought Leannimal won...but only cause hers was the least...bad. And I really felt Jerell was gonna go home, I was so very disappointed in his. Once again, the judges and I are not on the same plane. But really, all four were so bad, I can't blame them for picking him to win.

So who makes it to NY Fashion Week? We still don't know. The judges felt it was just too close, so they all have to create their runway designs and then it'll be decided which three are good enough to head to the final runways.
Cop out. Serious cop out. Personally, I think this was yet another stunt by the producers who want to keep Kenley's drama in the show. I mean, if it was the other three, who get along adoringly, where would be the friction, the conflict? Now, with all four coming back, we have more scraping.

Ugh. I think I need another glass of wine...
Yeah, I think I need several. But let me add something I noticed: in the next episode, when Heidi says, "You're Out" she's looking to her extreme left. Who ever's standing on the far left in the final line up is gonna go. Just my prediction.

Next week: Jerell takes the check, Tim rides a bicycle built for two, sexual dresses, and the cold shoulder for Kenley

POLT Listening to "I Need A Man" by The Eurythmics

"It's a joke." "Oh, I'm sorry. It's hard to pick up on the sublety of your wit." - Lindsey, Freaks & Geeks

Take it to the runway (Part 10)...

Once more, it's time for...

A Project Runway Rundown from a gay man's and a straight man's perspectives

Rock-N-Runway

Oh...my...shit. This rundown's going to be totally laced with expletives. Parental discretion is advised...
Yeah, I totally share the sentiments, even if I don't share the expletives.

Allow me to first say Suede referred to himself as Suede at 9:02, 9:05 (three times), 9:18, and 9:58 (three times). Considering the outcome, it's kinda unfortunate this'll be the last time we hear that. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Okay, first off, kick-ass challenge: Design an outfit for one of the other designers in the style of a specific musical genre. Brilliant. Really. Loving it.
Korto for Suede -- Punk
Kenley for Leanne -- Hip hop
Suede for Jerrel -- Rock & roll
Jerrel for Kenley -- Pop
Leanne for Korto -- Country
Okay, already Leanne's got a handicap. Country's all over the place. From glam to gaudy to white trash, country music runs the gamut. This'll truly be a challenge for her. The rest should be pretty damn easy.
My thought were: Leannimal, hip-hop? No. Korto, country? Double no. Although Suede being punk isn't that far off.

And Leannimal, sweetie, please don't attempt to rap anymore. You're WAY too white to even try.

On the commercial break intro, they show Tim and Kenley having a bit of a sparring match. The quote from my son Chaz: "Ooo. Looks like Tim's going to lay the beat-down on Kenley." (He said it with a gleam in his eye...)
Oh how I wish it were so...my eyes were gleaming too.

I'm liking Korto's initial design. Very punk -- though an easy genre to be sure. Jerrel's outfit looks more Barbarella than pop, but he's been able to pull stuff off in the past, so let's see where he takes this. Suede's sketch looks a bit safe -- where's the rock 'n roll attitude?
Okay, the total highlight of the night: Kenley being bitchy towards Tim. He's the mentor of the show, Kenley, treat him with some respect. Of course, she doesn't. And Tim, in a very un-Tim-like move, calls her out, telling her to cut the sarcasm and listen. Obviously she doesn't -- because she's Kenley and she knows *far* more than this measly little Tim Gunn. (Shootin' some sarcasm right back atcha, little Miss.) Her assessment of the conversation: "I can't really listen to Tim right now. What does he know about hip hop anyway?" Yeah. He may not know all the ins and outs of hip hop, but he knows what looks good, so when he questions your design, you sure as fuck oughta listen to him. "I don't think he (Tim) understands me," she finally says. Well, sister, he *does* understand *design*. And yours is kinda sucking pond water right now. Kenley may well be doomed in this challenge.
Well, I had a few things I wanted to say about their exchange, but, Dave S. dude, you said it SO much better than I had planned to. So we'll just move on.

Kenley is an utter *bitch*. Have I said that before? I think I have...
Well d'uh? that's like people being surprised Clay Aiken is gay. Puh-LEASE people.

Hey! I think I caught a Jerrel nipple for you, Polt! When are they going to show a little Leannimal boobage, though? C'mon. Just a little? Why, oh why, couldn't *she* be teamed with Jerrel's netted pop outfit? Damn. She's *so* much hotter than Kenley.
Yeah, butcha know, Jerell shirtless just isn't the same as Keith shirtless. Or Wesley shirtless. I mean, it's alright, but nothing fabulous. No his bulge in those skin tight, zippered jeans Suede made for him...Oh, I was fanning myself to keep from faintin!

LL Cool J as a judge? Perfect! Loving it. Kenley is ever closer to being off... (and he's the epitome of complete and utter cool.)
Not to mention ripped, cut, and fuckin' HOTTT! Yes, with THREE T's! Deal with it. Wy couldn't we catch some LL Cool J nipple? Now THAT woulda been worth seein!

Okay, okay....let me get a drink of water before we continue.

Thanks for waiting. Moving on...

The runway rundown:
Leanne: Not bad, but not excellent. A bit more mundane than I would've liked. I like the skirt though.
It's a flattering outfit on Korto, I'm just not sure it's really country.
Jerrell: Okay. Definitely pop. But the pasty-style boob coverings aren't doing it for me. I like the netting though, as well as the cut of black.
Oh THIS is outstanding! My God, he actually makes Kenley look hot. Who knew? I'm not a fan of the genre, nor of female singers (Duh), but I think this looks really really good!
Kenley: Ugh. pants are awful. Not hip hop at all. Not even close.
Oh this is horrible. I, Uncle Polt, look more hip-hop when I first get up in the morning than Leannimal in THIS ensemble.
Korto: Nice. Very punk. The jeans are great. A bit much on the chains, but I'm willing to overlook it.
I'm diggin it. And Suede rocked it on the runway. Very well done.
Suede: Not bad. Kinda safe, but the vest is incredible.
Not a bad outfit. Woulda been better if he accentuated Jerell's bulge a little more. (I kid, I KID!) Too understated I think.

My choices:
Winner: Korto
Off: Kenley
Winner: Jerell, although I wouldn't be upset if Korto won.
Loser: Kenley, of COURSE.

Of course, Kenley has to argue with the judges (once again). Advice for you, Kenley: Don't argue with Cool J. Seriously. It won't end well.
Okay, she might be able to claim Tim doesn't know hip-hop, but for Kenley to be arguing with LL Cool J about hip-hop??? Oh, please, girl. Why not try arguing with the Pope about Catholicism.

Winner: Korto (woohoo!)
Okay, I wanted Jerell, but I'm okay with this.
Off: Suede.
What?!? Suede?!? No way. No fucking way. Idiots! There's no *way* Suede's design was the worst of the two (him and Kenley's). Absolutely no way. Kenley blew this challenge completely and irrevocably. At least Suede's *looked* rock 'n roll -- regardless of it's inherent safety. Kenley's wasn't hip hop in the least. Poor poor judgement, guys.
Yeah, it went kinda like this withe me:
Heidi: Kenley.....
Polt: you OUT, bitch!
Heidi: You're in.
Polt: What the fuck? What the FUCK?!?!?!?! (okay, so I shared your explatives as well)

Obviously, to me anyway, this was the producers stepping in. Look, the judges all had nothing but negatives things about Kenley's outfit, and she argued with them over it. Suede's was just "not enough" or "too safe". Clearly, they were leaning on Kenley leaving. But, I feel certain, the producers came to them and pointed out the drama potential of Kenley, and how much more interesting the show would be with a "villian" for the veiwers to hate, and really, Suede's outfit wasn't all THAT great, now was it? And boom, Kenley stays.

Bastards. They did it in season 3, with Jeffrey, and season 2 with that tall bearded dude. There were some outfits of theirs that were simply horrid, and they kept moving him along. Kenley's the closest thing, I think, to a villian that they have, and they wanna keep her.

It is a travesty. And injustice. Almost on par with Chris Daughtry getting kicked off American Idol (the only season I watched) a few years back instead of winning.

It's just a bad, bad, wrong decision.

Chaz made this great analogy: "It's like Kenley is choosing to answer a multiple-choice test always with 'A'. She gets it right some of the time, but mostly she gets it wrong."
I think a better analogy would be she's choosing A always, and then the teacher changes an answer from D to A so Kenley can stay. It's just wrong all around.

Nonetheless, I like this Chaz of which you speak. His wit makes me smile. I think I shall enjoy meeting him.



Next week: Field trip! Kenley sasses Heidi! And tears from everyone on the runway, apparently.
POLT Listening to "Pinch Me" by The Bare Naked Ladies

Before you put your foot in your mouth, make sure you've washed it.

Take it to the runway (Part 10)...

It's once again for...

A Project Runway Rundown from a gay man's and a straight man's perspectives

This week, Dave S. wasn't able to participate, so I'm winging it alone. No problem, I used to do these all myself anyway. Dave S. will be back next week, we hope.

Transformations

Before we start, let Polt just say that Suede referred to Suede'self as Suede three times: 9:09, 9:11, and 9:23. Polt thinks that this HAS to stop. Now.

Leannimal makes and old lady outfit comment, for shame.

I really don't like saying this, but the dishey queen in me can't help...did anyone else think Kenley's model Anna's mother look like she could be Anna's father? Just sayin...

"Flirty and awkward. Like me!" - Jerell

Since Stella's gone, Korto has declared herself the "queen of leatha". I'll believe it when I see her start "hammering studs". (don't I have a porno by that title involved carpenters and thier...tools?)

OH, there's a puppy at Mood! And why didn't they show him before now???

This episode we get background on all of the designers. Leannimal was the first one they showed, and usually, that's the death knell for the designer, so I was fearful for her. And then I saw they were doing everyone, and all was right with the world again.

"Leanne got 'the Hedda Lettuce' this week." - Brilliant! We need to work that into our vocabulary people! "The Hedda Lettuce" - a bitchy, unhappy with things type of person. Difficult to work with. There, I've defined it for you, run with it, kids, run with it!

Pocket squares abound! this is, I think, the first time I've heard pocket squares discussed on PR...and for good reason.

Gatherarounds are never a good thing. - Suede

Tim says:
Suede - pockets are off line
Joe - dress is not in her field
Jerell - stunning
Kenley - gives her options, but he 'doesn't understand' and she's not listening to him
Nothing to Korto or Leannimal apparently.

Joe's motivation is so his daughters know they can do anything? huh? he's not there to WIN like every other designer????

The Girls DISH! they think Suede's gonna go, and Kenley just doesn't understand Suede or his aesethic. Which is okay, cause I don't understand much about HER at all!

OH, who was that tall, hot, black guy with dreads in the workroom right before they went to the runway? He was there, and then they cut away from him! HIM, I wanna see more of.

TO the Runway:
What the HELL is on Jerell's head? Did a low-flying bird strike him without his knowledge?

Joe - What I see is L.A.Law, circa 1989.
Leannimal - It's a nice dress, if a tad Jackie-O.
Jerell - Outstanding, well done.
Korto - I think the skirt is too short, and I don't like the way the jacket bulges in places
Suede - I like the dress, although the jacket doesn't work at ALL, either with the dress OR alone.
Kenley - Kinda messy, makes her look real hippy.

Top three - Leanne, Jerell, Suede
Bottom three - Joe, Korto, Kenley
My winner: Jerell. My loser: Joe

NINAGARCIA: I will say no more. Suede: Ouch. Polt: InDEED. Speaking of death knells...
Oh, and what the HELL is NINAGARCIA wearing over the fingers of her right hand? An aqua cast????

The winner: Jerell! Again! (and Kenley looks pissed. teehee)
The loser: Joe.

the judges got it just right this week!



Next week: "Most unique show", sabotage!, Tim's ripping the stitching outta Kenley, and LL COOL J! (Man, he's HOT!) Oh, and best of all, Dave S. returns! yay!

POLT Listening to "Sexy Boy" by AIR

"Someday soon, Carl, an influs of hormones, that we can't control, will overrule our better judgement and force us to pursue the female of the species." "No! Stop it, Jimmy! You're scaring me!" - Carl, Jimmy Neutron

Take it to the runway (Part 9)...

It's time once again for...

A Project Runway Rundown from a gay man's and a straight man's perspectives

What's Your Sign

Dave S.: This week it was all about designing an avant garde outfit with an astrological sign in mind. Awesome. I can already sense the tension in the air.
Polt: The previous losers are all back!!! Tension's thick in the air like testosterone in a lockerroom. Gotta watch out for those brigdes people burned.

And let me just add, Daniel, Terri, Jerell, and Suede are ALL Sagittarians, just like me! Although, frankly, I'm not sure I want to be paired in the same group as any of them...

And, boy, was there tension. But only with one coupling.
It just make you wonder if the choices actually WERE random? I mean, could the producers have hoped for a better pairing than Keith and Terri?

Here's the teams:
Korto & Kelli -- Aquarius
Kenley & Wesley -- Aquarius
Suede & Jerry -- Libra
Joe & Daniel -- Aries
Blayne & Stella -- Libra
Leanne & Emily -- Scorpio
Terri & Keith -- Leo

Hm. I wonder which of the teams is going to encounter the most confict? (he asked sarcastically) Could it be the two people who work well with no one? Yeah. Terri & Keith had sparks flying immediately. Right away, she started treating him like a fifth wheel. My thought early on: Terri's not going to be successful if she doesn't have a better working attitude with Keith. C'mon, treat my poor eliminated boy with at least a *little* respect. Terri: "Maybe he could count the pins that fall on the floor." Psh. Horrible.
I was NOT down with all of Terri's dissing of Keith. I mean, she ignores his help, tells him she doesn't need him to do anything and then gets all pissy and whiney when confonted about it by Tim AND the judges! She, like Kenley, always did have a rather high opinion of herself and her talent.

In Keith's own words: "What a fucking nightmare." You got that right, brother.
Amen.
At one point, Terri complains that she's "working alone." News flash for you, sister: You're working alone because you're choosing to.
Oh, and Kenley, just FYI, it's not "being fun," it's being arrogant. Shape up and get smart.

Just a few other things I noticed:
I think we heard more from Jerry this one episode than all the previous ones...course I know he got Aufed the first episode, but still...
Jerell has a BAD, horrid fabric choice!
I am NOT diggin Leannimal's exo-skeleton thingee.
What the HELL is Kenley doing? Those sleeves? The clashing fabrics? Well, Wesley got it all figured out, that's why he's not saying anything, he ain't going down again when Ship Kenley sinks.
Tim: Good synergy between Terri & Keith. .....crickets....total silence.... LOVED IT!
And it took until 9:35 for Suede to finally refer to himself in the third person. But damn he sure made up for it on the Runway. How pretentious. I'm glad Kors called him out on it...although not to his face. Someone needs to tell Suede to stop called Suede Suede. Seriously.

Polt! You got your bare-chested Wesley! (well, not that he has much of a chest to show off, but hey...) Woohoo for Polt! :-)
And YES! I believe I actually cheered out loud when they showed it! It's even more obvious to me now that he was kicked off WAY too early! I mean, the eye candy quotient was off the CHART with just him there! *SIGH* what might have been...

Okay, so not only do we find out that there are going to be *two* designers eliminated, but that the winner is going to be chosen by (drum roll, please)...designers from previous seasons! Very cool.
I don't think I like either of these things. I don't like two going at the same time, and I was underimpressed with the designers. I mean, what the HELL is Daniel thinking with that stupid Peggy Fleming-esque haircut???? Shouldn't he have a better hairstyle than THAT...I mean he IS gay, right? And the other designers...not overly impressed with the ones that were there.

So they all meet up at some place, but I don't remember what it's called. One of those star-watching things. Help me out here, Polt. Anyway, the models in their dresses are shown off in a party setting so the previous Project Runway designers can take a good look at them. Kenley is arguing with Heidi! What the hell?! Kenley shut up for a second and *listen*. She gets into a friendly argument with her about boob height. Seriously. Heidi Klum and Kenley are arguing boobs. It was priceless. I know you got 'em, Kenley, but I have a feeling that Heidi knows more about fashioning around small breasts than you do. I'm just sayin'.
Heidi didn't get Kenley's boobs or Blayne's idea....and neither did I.

And OH, for one last time...Stella's Hammering Studs!!!!

So here's the runway rundown:

Blayne: Ugh! Omigosh, uglier than mange on a poodle. Yuck.
No way! It has nothing to do with Libra, and just looks amateurish.
Kenley: Costume! Ugly ugly ugly. Kinda looks like a cartoon.
Aquarius? HUH? I see the outline of a cartoon character when he goes through a wall. And the conflicting fabrics... The whole thing is just stupid and ugly.
Terri: Okay. The red is a bit, I don't know...plastic? And weirdly shiny.
Not bad. Definitely better withOUT the collar...but not very avant garde.
Korto: Awesome. Totally Aquarius.
It's a nice look, very Aquarius.
Joe: Beautiful! Great flow. I'm really surprised.
I can see the flames, yes, but I don't really see Aries, the ram. Still a nice dress.
Jerrell: Not bad. It's elegant. Nice.
Other than the arrow in her hair I see no Sagittarius. Not sure if I like it or not.
Leanne: Interesting. Very different. The shadow on the face is cool.
I don't get the Scorpio from it. I don't think I like this one.
Suede: Nice flow. Looks beautiful against the skin of the model.
I don't like it. I see what he was going for...but I don't think he reached it.

I choose Blayne and Kenley to be out, with Terri a very close third.
I choose Joe as the winner.
My choice: Blayne and Kenley easy outs, and as for the winner...I wasn't really impressed with ANY of the dresses, actually. I guess if I had to choose, it'd be Korto, cause I could definitely see Aquarius in it.

Top Four: Korto, Joe, Jerrel, and Leanne (whew -- I was worried about her this time around).
Bottom Four: Blayne, Kenley, Suede, and Terri.

Winner: Jerrel. What the fuck? No no no. Joe's was five times better than his.
HUH???? Yeah, I question this one too. I thought his could have been in the bottom. None of them really impressed me anyway, but of the four, Jerell's was the least inspired. That's what you get with the previous year's designers.
Out: Blayne and Terri. (damn. Kenley survived *again*...)
Man, did the Judges miss it AGAIN! Terri's wasn't very avant garde, this is true, but for God's sake, you could at least see Leo in it. kenley's? Stupid, ugly, incoherent. I think the producers are keeping her on to keep the drama going.

Okay, Terri, you blew it. You blew it because you had negative preconceived notions about Keith instead of choosing to work with him. In Tim's words, he's innovative -- use him. Keith is tough to work with, for sure, but dammit, put your pride away and deal with him as a collaborator rather than an annoyance. To be honest, I don't think she would've worked well with anyone other than someone who's only known English words were "yes, ma'am." You're from my city and I would've liked to see someone from here win, but Kelli is *far* better than you. And Kelli's opened her own shop here in Columbus -- not New York -- which I think is kick-ass.
I don't think Terri's was the worst, but I'm not sad to see HER go.




Next week: Special ladies, sexy teacher dresses, and NINAGARCIA has problems.

POLT Listening to "City Of Delusion" by Muse

I am what I am, and what I am, needs no excuses! - I Am What I Am

Take it to the runway (Part 8)...

Time once again for...

A Project Runway Rundown from a gay man's and a straight man's perspectives

Double-O Fashions

Okay, first off, I have no idea who this Diane von Furtenberg is. Does that make me a bad Project Runway reviewer?
Nah, Dave S., not knowing who she is just makes you a straight guy.

Secondly, this wasn't a particularly engaging episode for me for some reason. But even then, there's some interesting things...
Yeah, I wasn't really excited about it, but they tried to make some drama, with everyone being paranoid around each other and stuff.

First off, the sketches: Being an artist, I love it when they show the drawings the designers are working from. Blayne's sketch was great. Nice look and nifty lines. What happened? The outfit didn't end up looking too much like the sketch. Jerrell's sketch was cool too. I worried that Korto's design in her drawing seemed really bland. Joe's was interesting. Leanne's was pretty damn nice.

And from now on, I shall call her Leannimal...
Heheeheh....yeah, good call there. Got a few observations myself here...

Stella makes coffee in a bikini top...not sight worth seeing.
Blayne wants Mary-Kate Olsen...ya know, he kinda looks like an Olsen twin...
Kenley cries over meeting Diane von Furstenburg, all Beatlesmania-like.
I know who Diane is, I know what American Express is, I have not idea what CFDA is.
Kenley cries over Diane's prints.
By the way, Blayne, the 80's called, they want their headband back.
Leanne is now the spy Leannimal. Brillant.
Kenley cries over her dress.
Stella rags on the judges.
Kenley....wait for it....cries over the pressure.
Jerrell in tight undies again! YAY!

The creation phase:
Okay, right off the bat, Kenley's dress looked boring boring boring while she was building it. It may have nice lines or whatever, but it's ulitmately a form-fitting dress. Not excited about it.
I liked the look actually, although it would have been nicer with something else instead of just the dress. And a different print.
Leanne's jacket wasn't working for me at all. Too bulky. And Tim was right -- waaay too long. This was worrying me. But the gown part was incredible.
Oh the gown was amazing! The jacket didn't work either for me.
They didn't show too much of Joe's while he was creating it, but what was up with those colors? They seemed to clash, but not in a good way.
I know, that's what I was thinking, clashing all the way!
Stella's started to look perhaps interesting, but then started not looking interesting...
I liked Stellas...but there was no hammering studs this week!
And when is Kenley going to stop crying, for Pete's sake...?
Great question....

By the way, it only took Suede 11 minutes to refer to himself in the third person, but I believe Blayne never said a 'licious' thing! At least one of them learned!
Oh, and Heidi's spy name should DEFINITELY be Venus Schnitzel! Or else she needs to pass it on to some drag queen....

Now, on to the runway...
Joe: Interesting, but the colors clash and it's poorly constructed. I don't like how it's working together. The back is bad.
I wrote: colors don't match and very messy.
Leanne: Wow. She pulled off that jacket by shortening it. That gown is beautiful.
Loved it. The jacket still was a bit off, but a great look nonetheless.
Terri: Not sure about this one. The design of it is nice, but that jacket is just a bit weird.
Hated the jacket...shirt was too busy.
Jerrell: It just looks bulky. Though it's not bad, it's certainly not great.
I wrote that I don't like (something) but otherwise okay. no idea what that was, as I was writing very quickly. Sorry.
Korto: Nice use of the yellow, but it kinda comes off plain to me.
Okay...but the print's a bit too much for my tastes.
Blayne: Pants are cool and the jacket's nice. But the colors and mix of fabrics are awful.
I wrote: hate the pants. No.
Suede: Ugly ugly ugly. That clash of fabrics is not working for me.
Don't match at all. too incongruous.
Stella: Kinda grim. And plain. I can't put my finger on it, but it just doesn't work.
I actually liked it. I mean it wasn't the best by far, but she didn't use leatha, and I think it still worked out okay.
Kenley: The cool fabric and neck just can't overcome the basic-ness of the overall design. It's nice, but not overly notable. Did she not pay attention to that Look Book?
I didn't like the print itself, too floral, but I liked the Mandarian look.

Judges Top 3: Kenley (huh?), Leannimal, Korto
Judges Bottom 3: Joe, Suede, Stella
My winner: Leanne. My loser: Joe.

Winner: Leannimal (woohoo!)
Out: Stella
Okay, the top one didn't surprise me. I think Leannimal's was by far the only piece that they could've chosen. Far and away the best of the bunch. The way the folds on the back of the jacket flowed into the folds on the back of the gown was nothing short of brilliant. This was the only design where all the pieces actually worked together to create a single aesthetic.
I totally agree. Her dress alone was the absolute best thing on the runway.

But the judges chose Stella as the worst?! No way. Joe's was terrible. It was a hot mess (if I'm allowed to use that term as a straight guy). Stella's was bad, but not the horribleness of Joe's. That back didn't work at all. The judges got this one wrong, in my opinion.
I agree again my friend...Joe's was messy and mismatch and not coherent. he should have gone.

At this point, the designers that I see making it to the top three: Leanne, Korto, and (begrudgingly) Kenley. Though Terri's not far behind in fourth.
I was thinking about this too, and I don't know who's gonna make it. Leanne I hope, she's turned out to be a favorite of mine now, even though I still only see dowdy schoolmarm when i look at her. And Korto probably, although I've really not been impressed with her at all. The other one, no idea.


Next week: GuestS! Pooping fabric! And NINAGARCIA is back!!!!

POLT Listening to "Oliver's Army" by Elvis Costello

Toronto, it's like no other city I've ever seen. It's like Albany, only cleaner. - Canadian Bacon

Take it to the runway (Part 7)...

Now, it's time for....

A Project Runway Rundown from a gay man's and a straight man's perspectives

Well, kids, being the political junkie that I am, I've spent this week doing little in the evenings but watching the Democratic Convention. That includes tonight. So I told Dave S. this week it was all him. However, in between the end of former President Bill Clinton's speech and the beginning of future Vice-President Joe Biden's speech, I did flip over to watch the show. All I saw was the last twenty minutes or so of the show, basically, the runway walk on.

I'll just add my two cents quickly, saying that I was WAAAY off from the judges this week. I thought Terri's was the best, and I thought Jerell's was the worst. I found it disturbing, but that might be because I thought the hairthing he has going on on his model's head was distracting to me.

I'm still seeing dowdy schoolmarm when I see Leanne, but I did think she was really cute when she smiled at the end. And dammit I was sad to see Keith go, just for the hunky factor. Blayne and Jerell are easy on my eyes, but they're not hunky like Keith was. Ah well, I'd GLADLY volunteer to get him out of Utah and dry his tears....poor dear....poor hunky dear....

And without further ado, I turn it all over to Dave S. Take it away...

Tonight's challenge, from the top of a parking garage, is to use the materials in a Saturn (a Saturn?! Hondas are *so* much sexier...) to create an "innovative" outfit.

My first thought: Stella's gonna kick some serious ass at this challenge. But then she started talking about what she was planning. *Not* leather?! Cute?! Pretty?!? Good lord, she's going to crash and burn...

And Kenley. Sheesh -- even when she's talking normal, she sounds like she's whining. And that was before she *really* started whining after her model dropped out of the competition.

Leanne's outfit started out great and just kept getting better. The idea of fraying the seatbelt fabric was ingenious. And beautiful. Just like her. :-)

Blayne's sketch looked awesome. Great design. But then he started constructing it and realized that he couldn't make it work like he was hoping. A change in direction caused a downhill spiral that wasn't completely evident until his model walked down the runway.

Terri was a bitch by laughing at Korto's jacket dress. Of course, Korto had the last laugh on the runway.

We were into the show an entire 10 minutes before Suede mentioned himself in the third person. And that was the only time. So that begs the question: Is it Suede or the producers who are getting bored with it? And Blayne used "licious" only once when he called their erstwhile mentor "Timlicious." Which is just wrong on so many levels...

Okay, so we gotta talk about Keith. His stress level was so high that I was getting tense just watching him. He kept focusing on toning down his design to match what the judges had been telling him. But they didn't tell him to tone it down, they simply were looking for a different technique. He worried me from the start when he talked of his outfit being "fitted and toned down." And worse that he was doing it to appease the judges. No no no! Then he started getting cocky. "I just feel like I deserve it more than the others." There's an old saying, Keith: Never ask for what you deserve.

Okay, let's hit the runway...

Jerell: Interesting. Futuristic. But the boobs were totally odd. Who would want their breast squished into a horizontal, kinda droopy shape? The detailing was nice though.
Keith: Boring. Certainly not innovative.
Terri: Not bad. Nice lines. Nothing overly new, but pretty.
Kenley: Okay, but the overall shape was somewhat flat. The flange on the skirt was different, but a bit clown-collar-ish.
Leanne: Stunning. Amazing skirt. Great stitching throughout. Well tailored.
Suede: Really nice. Well done.
Korto: Beautiful. A bit stiff-looking, but I gotta say that she really pulled it off. Looked great.
Blayne: Stiff and puckering. He went all Keith on this one. And it didn't work for *him* either. The mirror pieces added to the horror.
Joe: Interesting. I really liked the Saturn logo panel on the front. Very clever. However, the construction of it wasn't very good.
Stella: Interesting, but not quite there. The top and bottom didn't match.

Top 3: Jerrell, Korto, and Leanne.
Bottom 3: Blayne, Keith, and Stella.

The judges once again got it right. Leanne was the winner (and likely won easily). One of the judges said that she could see it on a Paris runway and I definitely have to agree. A gorgeous piece of work. This is twice now that Leanne's won -- she just may have what it takes to make it to the final runway.

And Keith (sadly) is out. Not only didn't he answer the challenge, but he failed it by reigning himself in. And criticizing the critics probably didn't help his case any. I'm sad to see him go. When he was on, he was on, but his insecurities got the best of him.

No outstanding lines this time around, except for a heart-wrenching one from Keith at the end: "I'm going home for something that wasn't me." :-(

Next week: A "fashion legend"! But I have no idea who she is... (Should I?)
Dave S. you're so terminally straight (in a good way) that I guess it's okay you don't know who she is. But don't worry, I still love ya.



Next week: Diane Von Furstenburg! And lot of HUGEness! And will NINAGARCIA be back???

POLT Listening to the Democratic Convention

It is possible that blondes also prefer gentlemen. - Mamie Van Dorn