Kris and I have more of less drifted apart.  I can't even remember the last time we hung out....during summer, perhaps.  We still texted occasionally or messaged on Facebook and stuff.  But other than that, well our contact was nil.

I got a text from him today.  He told me, first, that he loved me (which I knew, he and I have said that before...although he meant a different kind of love than what I meant, but still...).  Then he said he wanted me to know that he had a boyfriend now and was in a relationship.  He said that as one of his oldest and closest friends, he wanted me to know that.  The guy's name was Dwayne, he was 46, lived in a close town and was very sweet.

I texted him back telling him I was glad to know he found someone, and that I hoped he was happy with the guy, and I appreciated that he told me all this, and if he needed anything, to just let me know.

And I meant all that I said.  I wish he had found the relationship with me, but if it can't be me, I'm just glad he found someone.  But it still hurts.  A little.  I mean, it's not unexpected, I had already come to the conclusion he and I were never going to be what I wanted us to be.  But knowing this....well it makes it a bit more final.

But Kris is rather mercurial, so who knows how long this will last?  And at least we're still friendly.  This is just something I have to be the bigger man about, the grown up about, and deal with.  And I think I have.  I mean it's not like I'm heart broken, or depressed or suicidal or anything, cause I'm not.  It's just something that I now have to get used to.

It's like Frank Ocean says....

POLT