Because he’s too pooped to pop, too old a soul...

So, the sewer's backed up again.  Yeah, this is like the third time this year.  I didn't find it until the late afternoon, and then afterthat  I confirmed that the people on the other side of the house also had a backup, so it wasnt until 3-ish that I called the plumber.  Naturally, he wont be able to get here until tomorrow morning.

So while I can use the water taps, I dont want any of the water to go down the drains.  I have small basins in the kitchen and bathroom sink to catch any water I use, and I have a bucket with some water in for me to pee in. (yeah, one more reason why I'm glad I'm not a woman who needs to sit and wipe)  And when I shower tomorrow morning, I'll put the plug in the tub and keep it there until it's all clear.

But what to do about pooping?  Well, I've got a few options, and I thought I'd list them here.

10.Check into a motel, but that seems rather expense for just the use of a toilet.

(And plus sometimes you get unwanted visitors there.)

9. Find a nearby construction site, climb the chain link fence, and use the port-a-potty.

(Hey, it's purple, it can't be ALL bad, right?)

8. Use mom's bathroom,good thing she's only a 5 minute walk away.

(note, this is NOT how mom's bathroom looks, thank god)

7. Use the local convience store bathroom, less than 5 minute walk, but much less privacy too.

(And frankly, I'd rather shit my pants than even open a door that looked in on this.)

6. Load up on Pepto-Bismol and anti-diarrheals and hope that keeps everything in order until tomorrow.

(But I HATE the taste of Pepto)

5. Eat a LOT of cheese and hope that keeps everything in order until tomorrow.

(But I want to be able to poop tomorrow, and too much cheese binds me up for days!)

4. Find another bucket, use one for liquids and one for solids.

(Even I'm disturbed by the fact I find this kid cute, despite what he's doing)

3. Wait until it's dark and everyone's asleep and sneak out to the tree in the backyard.

(Just watch out for that poison ivy out there!)

2. A neighbor is always complaining about the dog poop left on his property so.....you think he would notice a difference?

(Just watch out for that poison ivy out there!)

1. Cross my legs and think happy thoughts.

(And pray...pray a LOT!)

POLT