Monday, February 01, 2016

Grabs my soul, shakin' through my body like a Super Bowl (2015 edition)...

Super Bowl is comping up very soon.  And that means it's time to use several categories to determine who will win the game!

1) The Cities


Charlotte, North Carolina


Denver, Colorado

Well, I've never actually spent any time in either one, although on a trip to Columbia South Carolina once I drove through Charlotte on I-77.  Never been anywhere near Denver.  So that means...

Winner: Panthers
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2) Distance from Super Bowl.

This year, the Super Bowl is being held in Santa Clara California.   Denver is 1280 miles away, Charlotte is 2861 miles away.

Winner: Broncos
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3) Coaches

Broncos coach is Gary Kubiak.


He is 54 years old.  He played for the Denver Broncos from 83-91.  He was the Head Coach of the Houston Texans from 06-13.  He became the Head Coach of the Denver Broncos in 15.  This is his first Super Bowl.

Panthers coach is Ron Rivera.


He too is 54 years old.  He played for the Chicago Bears from 84-92.  He has been the Head Coach of the Panthers since 2011.  This is his first quarterback.

Winner: I gotta call THIS one a tie.
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4) Face of the Quarterback

Broncos quarterback is Peyton Manning:


Panthers quarterback is Cam Newton:


Cam's face is cuter, and dimplier, and smilier.

Winner: Panthers
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5) Body Of The Quarterback

Broncos Peyton Manning's Shirtless


Panthers Cam Newton's Shirtless


Well hell....THIS one is pretty damn obvious, dontcha think?

Winner: Panthers
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6) Experience Of The Quarterback

Broncos Peyton Manning: He's 39, has been in the NFL since 1998.  He's been in three Super Bowls, with a record of 1-2.

Panthers Cam Newton: He's 26, has been in the NFL since 2011.  He's not been to any Super Bowls yet.

Winner: Broncos
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7) Other Star Player

The Broncos have Demaryius Thomas:

The Panthers have Luke Kuechly:

I know nothing about either one of them, and they both look pretty tasty so, I'm calling this one even.
.
Winner: Tie
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8) Team Name/Mascot

Broncos: a wild horse

Panthers: a wild cat

Hmm, I don't know.  I suppose a panther, in the wild, could bring down a bronco and eat it.  The reverse is not true.   So I'll give this one to the Pnathers.

Winner: Panthers
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9) Team Logo

Denver Broncos

Carolina Panthers

So, a white horse head with a fiery orange mane, or a roaring black panther head outlined in blue.

Winner: Panthers
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10) Team Super Bowl History

This will be Denver's 8th trip to the Super Bowl (which is pretty impressive, as that's how many times Dallas has been there!), but they've only won 2.

This will be Carolina's 2nd trip to the Super Bowl, but they've never won.

So no matter how you slice it, Denver comes out on top.

Winner: Broncos
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11) 2015 Season Team Record

Denver Broncos: 12-4

Carolina Panthers: 15-1

Winner: Panthers
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12) My Bets

While the Denver Defense is #1 this season and very formidable, and while I'd like to see an amazing quarterback like Peyton go out on a high note, I'm picking Carolina to win.  They're offense is amazing and #1 this season, and Cam Newton is just so freakin cute and sexy, and has so much FUN playing the game, I just want him to win.

Winner: Panthers
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So, according this VERY UN-scientific poll, it comes out to be the Panthers with 7, the Broncos with 3 and two ties.  And thusly...

The Carolina Panthers will win Super Bowl 50.

And just to put an exclamation point on everything, here's a photo of Cam from a few years back, looking all cute and sexy in a tight wifebeater, showing off the shoulders and biceps.  Enjoy.


POLT

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