Oh and the shit, shock, horror, you've seen...

First a Republican's gonna be sitting in Teddy's seat. Then Ping manages to somehow stay on Project Runway despite her saddlebags and ass flaps. And now THIS:

"According to a new research out of the UK, men who have frequent sex in their twenties and thirties were at a greater risk of developing prostate cancer later in life. What's even more unusual is that researchers showed that young men who masturbated frequently, as opposed to those who have sex frequently with a partner, were at an even greater risk of developing prostate cancer."

What more could go wrong? Will a meteor crash into the Atlanitc Ocean? Will the BBC shut down BBCAmerica? Will Lady GaGa reveal herself to be actually P!nk is disguise all this time? Will the Cloverfield moster drag us all to hell? WHAT ???

POLT

SOme boys kiss me, some boys hug me (Part 201)...

Frenching Fridays

Last week Tam left a comment saying "Some friends and I have determined that the new hotness is the "almost kiss" as depicted in said photo. VERY hot." and then she put a link to this lil beauty:


Since I agree with Tam, and her friends, I've decided to make this week's theme the "Almost Kiss" Kiss. Now Tam, and her friends, and us as well, can enjoy the hotness!





POLT Listening to "With A Little Help From My Friends" by The Beatles

Man's creativity expands geometrically to his greed. - Law & Order

Take it to the runway (Part 14)...

Bringing back an old favorite, I give you....


First a shot of all the new designers:

Minus the first one (thankfully) kicked off:

Okay, since I didn't get a chance to do this last week, I'm going to offer some opinions on the designers:

Anthony: Flaming (hell, he's an conflagration!), but do-able.
Ben: Cute, despite the nose.
Emilo: Not cute, but not Quasimodo either.
Jay: Asianly cute.
Jesse: Cute in a Christian Bale kinda way.
Jesus: Divinely cute.
Jonathan: Stubblyish cute-ish.
Seth Aaron: No. No, no. No. Gotta stop dressing like he's 20 years younger than he is.

And now, onto the show: "The Fashion Farm" Make an outfit out of a burlap sack.

Okay, my three favorite dresses were by Amy, Mila and surprisingly by Janeane as well. my favorite was Mila's. I'm not at all bothered by the judge's decision, cause Jay's dress really did look good with the feathery-ness of it.

My three least favorite were Ping ("ass flap" and saddlebags), Seth Aaron (a hoddy? Really? And was that a lamp shade he had on her as a skirt?) and Pamela (Looked a little bland to me). My least favorite was Ping's. I wasn't terribly upset at the judges decision, although I thought Ping's was worse and I Pamela seemed like a nice person.

And now, onto Dave S.'s comments:

Okay, Ping is just about on my last nerve. She just comes off as arrogant. Yuck. And her design sucked pondwater bigtime.

Jesse on the other hand is hot.

That's all. He's just, y'know...hot. I don't even remember what he designed this week. :-P

Okay, skipping the minimal drama, which isn't even worth mentioning, I gotta move to the runway. The judges for once seemed to pick the right ones for the top three. I felt Amy's was the best. I felt it answered the challenge the best -- there was no disguising of the burlap, no fancy extra things to distract from the fact that it was a basic fabric she built it out of. Yet it was stunning. Sure, Mila and Jae created great dresses, but Amy's was the most bold. The one that took the biggest risk (amongst the top three anyway). But in the end Jae won, and I wasn't hugely disappointed or surprised. His was pretty sweet.

But the bottom three were definitely bottom three. Yuck. Ping's was just awful. Easily the ugliest design I have ever seen on Project Runway. Good lord, *Cher* wouldn't have worn that thing. It was hideous. And I tire of her. I'm *already* upset about next week's episode where her and Jesse are shown working together. Or trying. Because she certainly wouldn't want to do things like someone else! Heaven's no! Compromise in order to successfully work with another designer that may do things in an organized and designerly way? Egad! Because she's "different," you know. She thinks about things on "a different level". Whatever. Get over yourself. And next week, you better not fuck with my Jesse, bitch.

Where was I...? Oh, right. Yeah. Jesus stayed and Pamela got booted. Which was a complete shock. I was completely expecting Jesus to get Heidi's 5-inch heals planted firmly in his little behind as he went sailing out the PR door. But no, it was Pamela and her yucky-butted monstrosity. Though it was a *hell* of a lot better than Ping's. Ping's was by far the worst on the runway.

Oh, and is it just me, or is Tim Gunn getting a bit sassy this season? Love it!

And I'll finish by saying I am in total and completel agreement with Dave S. and his assessment of Jesse.

POLT Listening to "No Excuses" by Alice In Chains

"Most sinners are in denial." "I am NOT in denial!" "See what I mean?" - Eddie, Teen Titans #35

cashed my winnings in long ago, settled for silver...

So, after last weekends NFL predictions, it turns out me and one other guy were left in the Loser's Pool at work. And be both decided, instead of going on, to just split the winnings! So I walked out of there today with $210 in my pocket! See, here's a photo!


This is cool not only cause who doesn't like a little extra $200 every so often, but, I need it to recoup my losses: $10 in the Winner's Pool, $25 bucks in the Playoff pool, $10 in the Loser's Pool, $20 (so far) on the Super Bowl boxes thingee, and $10 on the Biggest Loser pool. I'm still in the Playoff Pool ( Go, JETS!), and I won't know if I've won the Super Bowl thingee until the game, but I lost the Winner's Poll. And one of the other guys in the Biggest Loser has already lost 15 pounds! In two and half weeks! So I go no shot in HELL at winning that. But with $75 in expenditures, and $210 in winnings (so far) I'm $135 ahead of the game. Sweet.

POLT Listening to "I'm Alright" by Lindsay Buckingham

I haven't posted much today cuase it's been a rough day. It involved headaches, projectile puking, poopies, body and joint aches (even my fingers!), shivering, sweating, a lot of laying on the sofa watching crap on TV, and not eating.

Eventually, I managed to get some crackers to stay down. And then I took some Advil to help with the pains. After that, I steadily felt better, eventually eating a can of chicken corn soup and getting back online here for a bit. I'm sure I'll get back to work tomorrow and get back to posting tomorrow as well.

Hope all of you are well.

POLT

To knock on the lavatory door, accusing me of ruining the fun...

So this morning and afternoon Mom came down and helped me around the house with some things and then we went to do some shopping for some things I needed (curtains, bedsheets, wastebasket, runners, etc, etc, etc). And as always, its always an adventure when one goes anywhere with Mama Polt.

The shopping itself was rather uneventful, other than we didn't get everything we needed. But we also decided to eat while we were out. We finished eating and were sitting there ready to go and she said she had to use the bathroom. I pointed over her shoulder showing her where they were. There was a small alcove with two door on either side going to the bathrooms.

She got up, I leaned back to easier scope out one hot young black guy with an ass to make JLo sit up and notice, who was there with his wife/gf and their adorable baby, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw something.

I swung my head around just in time to see mom's back going into the MEN'S ROOM! I clamped my hand over my mouth to keep from laughing hysterically. I expected her to come running back out when she figured it out, like maybe as soon as she saw the urinal! But she didn't come out.

The doors faced each other, I was perpendiuclar to them, so I couldn't acutally see the doors. But I knew that was the men's room, I had used it at that restaurant before myself. Perhaps, I thought, they switched the rooms, even though that seemed unlikely. I got up and took a step over to see, and yep, there was a sign with the man sillouette on it and the word MEN underneath it. So I just sat there, laughing into my hand so hard I was crying. I thought perhaps I should to and prevent any other guy from going in. But thought better of it. How funny would that be if it happened?

After a short while she came out and was smiling a bit.

Mom: Why didn't you tell me -
Polt: Yeah? *giggle*
Mom: That I needed to comb my hair before we left?
Polt: *doubletake* What?
Mom: I saw it in the mirror, it's a mess.
Polt: *double doubletake* What?
Mom: My hair. It's a mess.
Polt: .......Mom, was anything strange in the bathroom?
Mom: No, why?
Polt: Nothing strange, like a urinal or something?
Mom: Why would there be a urinal in the ladies room?
Polt: You weren't in the ladies room.
Mom: Of course I was.
Polt: No, you weren't.
Mom:*questioning look* That wasn't the ladies room?
Polt: *pointing over her shoulder* NO! It was the men's room!
Mom: *looking over her shoulder, then getting up and taking a step to see, realization flooding her face* That wasn't the ladies room!
Polt: Ya think?

Oh, her face turned red, and she laughed and laughed. She said she wondered why the seat was up on the toilet, but she just put it down and did her business. And she swore she didn't see a urinal, even though I know there's urinal's in there!

I told that apparently she's reached the age where she can't be trusted to go to the bathroom alone in public. But the whole incident led to so much laughing, and crying, on her part, she had to pee again before we left. And thankfully THIS time, she used the ladies room!

POLT Listening to "I Fought The Law" by the Clash

Look, I'm 40, I'm single, and I work in musical theater - you do the math. What do you need, flash cards? - Nathan Lane

An utterance, information, don't mince words (Part 169)...

TMI Tuesdays

These come from http://tmituesday.blogspot.com/

1. Ideal amount of sex per week? Alone: 15 times a week. With someone: 5 or 6 times a week. probably not all during the same week, though. Maybe when I was younger, but now, at 42, nope I don't think so.
2. Ever had an online affair? I'm not sure what this means. I've had 'affairs' with people I met online. There are a few guys in Indonesia I know from camming through Yahoo messenger and we play occasionally. If these count, then sure.
3. Are you a member of the mile high club? Nope. Only been on a plane like 4 times in my life and never had the opportunity.
4. Are you predjudice against any particular group of people? Yes. Close-minded, backwoods, redneck, ultra-conservative, judemental, Religious Right (who are actually neither truly religious, nor truly right), homophobic, wingnut Republicans. And unfortunately, there's a lot more of them out there than one would think.
5. What constitutes bad sex? I like the quote that reads, "Bad sex is still good sex cause it's sex."
Bonus (as in optional): Can females ejaculate? Honestly, I have no idea and I don't plan on ever being there to find out whether they can or not.

POLT Listening to "Running On Empty" by Jackson Browne

The leadership of the Republican Party are a bunch of sociopathic maniacs who had their lips super-glued to the ass of the conservative right. - Alec Baldwin

The more I laugh, the more i fill with glee...

Glee.


Yeah, what can I say that's not been said before?

I missed the premiere episose when it first aired last spring. I missed the re-airing of it last fall. And then, since I was behind already I didn't want to watch any of it until I could watch it all at once. This weekend the first disc arrived from Netflix. Due to NFL playoffs, I couldn't watch it until today.

This afternoon at roughly 2:30, I popped it in the VCR. And by 6:00, I had a copy of the entire first half of the first season in my hands. After watching the first four episodes, I NEEDED to see the rest of it. And right away. So I got myself ready, found a Wal-Mart gift card I didn't even know I had (SWEET!), drove right out there and bought it. And now I'm in the midst of a Glee-a-thon.

The show had me from the very first uttered line: "You think this is hard? Try water-boarding. That's hard." I've got a few comments: I'm only half way through, and I'm already tired of some storylines. I want the wife to just go away. She adds nothing to the mix. I want to see more of the 'secondary' characters. I know nothing about Tina except she's Asian and stutters. I don't even know the name of the wheelchair kid. I want to know more about the Asian 'pop and lock' dancer...mainly cause he's kinda cute. I know nothing about Mercedes background except her dad's a dentist. I mean, Fin and Rachel and Quinn and Puck are nice and all (especially Puck with his mohawk and pierced nipple and hard body and etc, etc, etc), but I want to hear more about the others. Maybe all this will change in future epsidoes, at least I hope it does.

While some of the stuff veers clearly into totally unbelievable land, the writing is some of the funniest and crispest I've heard since The West Wing. Jane Lynch is a GEM in this show, love her! I've decided, after her guest appearance, that I now want to have Kristin Chenowith's children, as many as she wants to have; even naturally, without medication, should she so desire. And Will has some pretty awesome biceps.

Now, back to the show.

POLT Listening to "Glee"

Jesse Helms and Trent Lott, two of the finest minds of the 12th century. - Paul Begala

You're wantin' my body, I don't mind (Part 235)...

MONDAY'S HOT SHIRTLESS GUY PHOTOS

This week's theme: Hot Shirtless Guys With Open Pants...And Nothing Underneath!






POLT Listening to "Hung" by Madonna

It is time for the Republicans in the Senate for once to put the interests of the United States ahead of the interests of the Republican Party. - Charley Reese, April 30, 2005

The way things are going, they're gonna crucify me...

I was reminded recently of just how awesome teh Interwebs actually are. Since the fall, when I'm online, either at work or here at home, I'm using listening to AOL Radio. They've got all these nifty individual channels that play specific music.

At this particular time, I had the Shuffle Channel on, which is, obviously, the channel where they don't have a genre, they just play a different song each time. So I had just heard "Unbelievable" by EMF and that was followed by "The Ballad Of John and Yoko" by John Lennon.

When I heard"Unbelievable" it brought back the memory of listening to it back in 1991, and not knowing what some of the lyrics were ("Your purple prose just gives you away"...what the HELL?) and my friends from England were visiting. So when they returned home, they sent me a letter with the lyrics included.

Contrast this with today: If one doesn't know the lyrics to a song, there's multiple websites one can get them from. And a letter! Who rights letters anymore in the age of emails?

And "The Ballad Of John And Yoko" took me back to roughly the same time period when a friend of mine and I were arguing if there was even a song called this. I was pretty sure i had heard the title at some point, but he was insisting there would never be anything as stupidly titled at that. So what was our solution? We called the local rock radio station, got the DJ and asked him (thankfully NOT on air) if there was such a song.

Contrast that with today: In less time than it takes me to type this sentence, I went to youtube and found a video of it.

Oh what did we do in the Dark Ages aka pre-Internet days?

POLT Listening to "Unbelievable" by EMF

It's hard to feel courageous in loose-fitting, drowsy-bear pajamas. - Calvin, Calvin & Hobbes

Let's get unconscious honey (Part 192)...

Unconscious Mutterings

These come each week from http://subliminal.lunanina.com/

I say ... and you think ... ?

Weak :: Tea
Flashy :: Neon
Sack :: Potatos
Business :: Man
Purple :: LOVE IT!
Fan :: Cooling
Airline :: Ticket
Guide :: Tour
Lunch :: Break
Exercise :: No thank you

POLT Listening to "One" by U2

In the end, everybody dies alone. - Pricess Taffera, ER

In the land of plenty, crying about my own virginity...

VOBUQ over on his blog had a post that piqued my interest. He mentioned that he has this weird belief that one's virginity resets the beginning of each year, and that allows you to have a "first time" each and every year (just click on the link and read it yourself, he says it much better than I could ever hope to).

As I said, interesting concept. A smidge depressing, cause under this thinking, I'm still a virgin. Which to me is a somewhat unique experience. Kinda like before I had my first Big Mac, or before I lost my first tooth: I know this situation once existed, but it's been so long since it happened, I don't remember it. But still, I'm halfway through the first month of the year, and still a virgin.

I wanted to see if this was unusual or not, so I went back and checked. (and yes, I DO keep track of my sexual encounters. Have done so since 1998. Shut up, we all our own little pecadillos, don't judge) So this is date I lost my virginity for each year:

1998: January 3rd.
1999: January 1st (I had a boyfriend at that time)
2000:January 15th
2001: January 4th
2002: January 13th
2003: January 27th
2004: February 9th
2005: March 14th (I obviously did NOT have a boyfriend at that time)
2006: January 3rd
2007: January 3rd
2008: February 4th
2009: January 9th

So that's an average of 18.92 days into the new year for me to lose that year's viriginity, which makes me feel a bit better. UNTIL, I took out the two outlying numbers (the one on the 1st, and the one in March) and then the average is 15.20 days into the new year.

Which means to make it this year on the average, I need to get laid sometime today? Even though there's football playoffs on ALL evening.

Anyone feel like helping a brother out at about 11:30 or so tonight?

POLT Listening to the Cardinals-Saints football game

In America, anybody can become president, and that's just one of the risks you take. - Adlai Stevenson

My baby's got a secret (Part 144)...

Secret Saturdays

These are from http://postsecret.blogspot.com. Stop by there and check it out. This week's theme is Celebrities!




POLT Listening to "I'll Be" by Edwin McCain

I've been around the world and found that only stupid people are breeding. - Harvey Danger, Flagpole Sitta

Take my hamster to the beach, you make me wanna ...

fI was in a local Ollie's Bargain Oulet recently (they buy stuff in bulk and sell it at super cheap prices) and I always have to peruse the book section. There's no organization to it, but I can usually find some good deals. I mean, if I book's a dollar or two, I'll buy it. Even if I'm not interested in it, what am I out?

So whilst rummaging through that, I saw this:


And a smile immediately crossed my face, cause the first thing to pop into my mind was Richard Parker! I'll grant you, the little guy on the cover is kinda cute, but no one tops Richard Parker in the cuteness.

POLT Listening to "What I Got" by Sublime

If the models get any younger they'll be chucking fetuses down the catwalk. - Patsy Stone, Absolutely Fabulous

Some boys kiss me, some boys hug me (Part 200)...

Frenching Fridays

No theme this week, just random liplockings.




POLT Listening to "Getting Better" by The Beatles

I'm fat, black, cranky and menopausal! You do NOT want to mess with me. - Amanda Waller, Suicide Squad #1

Tired and going to bed, but a quick Project Runway post.

Once more, my likes and dislikes are the polar opposites of the judges. I DETESTED Ping's...thing. I also didn't like Seth Aaron's at all! I did like Jesus's evening gown. I liked Anthony although I hated his dress, he's funny!

Thank GOD, the black chick went home. Her arrogance turned me off entirely. And Jesus was too cute to go the first week. I think the Asian guy's pretty cute too (d'uh), and the guy that was the pirate in his other job and wore the beret throughout the show. So they're my favorites to win.

I kid, I KID! I just want them to hang around for a bit so I can look at them some more. I don't have a favorite yet.

What did YOU think about the show?

POLT

PS
"Models Of The Runway"? No thank you. Listening to vapid size zero's whine about how rough their lifes are? Sorry, I got more important things to do. like sleep. Nite all.

Love's the funeral of hearts...

Over on Enrickyricardo'sblog earlier in the week, he posted about what he wanted his funeral to be like. And he, along with several commentors, made mention of the fact they've never been to an open casket funeral. This blew my mind, as that's pretty much ALL I've been to!

I come from a large family (pap was the oldest of 7, grandma 2nd oldest of like 7 or 8, and they all have kids, grandkids and great-grandkids now) and so I've been to many MANY funerals and viewings, well over 25 in my lifetime.

But, I know there were two that were closed: a kid I went to high school with who died when he was ejected from a car wreck and slid, head first along the highway for several dozen feet, and my dad, who didn't want an open casket (we just put a photo of him atop the casket).

At any rate, maybe the commentors were speaking about wakes, were I think the open casket sits in a room with the mourners there eating, drinking and talking to one another. That I've NEVER been to, and that would seem freaky to me.

But what normally happens around here, and what I'm used to, is the night before the funeral is a Viewing, where the cakset sits open and the family stands nearby and people line up to walk by the casket, pay their last respects and then give their sympathies to the family. And the next day is the funeral itself, where people can visit the caskte and pay thier last respects prior to the service. Then a pastor, or someone, speaks for a short while, everyone leaves, the family can have their last moments with the deceased, then the casket is closed and put in the hearse. Anyone that wants to goes to the cemetary where another very short service is held and the cakset lowered into the earth. Then everyone goes to a church/community center/someone house/what have you and that's where the food and drink are and socializing takes place. But the body isn't there.

This is the way that seems 'normal' to me. And while I know some people don't like funerals, and I don't enjoy them myself, I do go to them. Mainly for the ones left behind, not so much for the deceased.

So, what typs of funeral rituals do they observe where you are?

POLT Listening to "Message In A Bottle" by Sting

I'm sorry to be the one to tall you this, but this 'Sex In The City' forty-something-slut-on-the-prowl fad? It's over. So how 'bout you hobble back to the bar and join the rest of the Stepford Wives, 'KAY? - Kendra Saunders, Hawkman #34

What I need right now, is some good advice, please (Part 5)...

Barker's Bits Of Puppy Philosophy

POLT Listening to "Walk This Way" by Aerosmith

I'm like Dick Tracy...with breasts...and good hair. - The Huntress, Birds Of Prey #69

Love we're trigger hippies, yeah...

Dave S.? Is that you???



Hmmm, I don't know...could be....

POLT Listening to "Natural One" by Folk Implosion

I went to a Catholic wedding once and the incesne ruined my pants suit. - Marge, The Simpsons

Undress me, will I look like a fool (Part 196)...

Once more it's time for...

Well, kids, I think it's time to show you one of my favorite Christmas gifts of last year. A Local Celebrity, Mr. David ParisPeking got this for me.


It is, in fact, a Snuggie. But if one focused on just the lameness of the Snuggie itself, one would miss what makes this gift so awesome. If one looks closely, one can see it is a Snuggie made of DC Comics Superhero material!!!

Yep, there's Superman, Batman, Flash, Aquaman, Green Lantern, Shazam, and even Justice League of America crest as well!!! The sheer coolness of the material far outweighs any shame one feels in wearing (or even owning) a Snuggie!

To see what others have put up this week, click HERE

POLT Listening to "Only Happy When It Rains" by Garbage

I once knew a guy who could tie a cherry stem into a knot with his tongue. I was afraid to let him blow me. - Emmett, Queer As Folk