On a steel horse i ride, i'm wanted, dead or alive, wanted...

After work, I had plans to eat dinner with A Local Celebrity, Mr. David ParisPeking, and after that, we were going to a movie with Ghostie.



I got to the mall slightly early. ALCMDPP and I were eating at Garfields. It's situated in middle of the mall. The movies are on one end of the mall. When i got to the mall, I felt and urge to poop. I HATE pooping in public. But in the mall, there's a JCPenneys, at the opposite end from the movies, and they have their men's room in a corner that's currently surrounded by women's lingerie. I suppose at one time, it was the men's section, but anyway, it's a smallish bathroom and one that's not often visited, so I made my way there.

As planned, it was empty. i took the only stall and sat down. No sooner had that happened than the door opened and a guy walked in to use the urinal. Soon thereafter, another guy walked in and talked to him while they both used urinals! Of course, that meant I couldn't poop...they were IN there, can't do that. Finally, after what seemed like HOURS, the first guy washed and left.

With the other guy still in there, I pulled my cellphone out of my pocket and checked the time: 3:28. We were to meet at 3:30. I KNEW ALCMDPP would arrive there, not find me, and then call. While I'm sitting on the toilet. With the other guy in there. So I held the phone in my hand, thinking as soon as it starts, I can just shut it off.

And no sooner did I think that, than it did indeed go off and start ringing. And the suddenness of it startled me...and I dropped the phone. On the floor. A bit out of reach. *SIGH* SO I had to pull it towards me with my foot until I could reach it, all the time it's ringing, and the ringtone is echoing off the tiled walls. When I turned it off, the other guy was washing up. By the time he left, the phone had stopped. So I had to call ALCMDPP back, I could talk now that I was alone.

I told him I'd be there in 5 or 10 minutes. He said okay and asked where I was. Of course he would. I just told him i'd tell him when I got there, we hung up and I FINALLY got down to business. Luckily I got to do that uninterrupted.

The meal was good, the conversation better. We discussed things all politics, of course. I mean, I love having the opportunity to call Comedian Rush Limbaugh a flat (flat, not fat) out liar. Also, we discussed The Shingle Incident, his wife and daughters, offshore drilling, the screeching harpies on the radio, Glenn Beck, Keith Olbermann, Alaska, the desserts available, Ghostie, Pearl Jam, Melissa Etheridge, and his new sandals.

We walked around the Mall for a bit cause we had some spare time. I enjoyed checking out the eye candy at the mall. He bought a birthday card for his sister. I thought the card was stupid, and he had second thoughts about it himself, wanting to return once the movie ended. But since he had only paid $1.05 for it in the first place, I don't think that happened. We also looked for $1 flip-flops for his wife, but only found them in grey and brown, and apparently, his wife doesn't "roll that way".

We got out tickets and went into the lobby to wait for Ghostie. It was then we encountered James, who was taking tickets. I call him unofficially "Chuckles". Officially, given the chance, I'd call him, "Stupid Fucking Punk, Lose The Attitude, You Minimum Waged Moron". I fully realize that standing on your feet all day, in a movie theater lobby, wearing a horridly wrinkled shirt emblazoned with the theater's name and wearing a headset like an Old-Navy-employee-wannabe and doing nothing but tearing tickets in half and directing people to the left or right, when, if they had an ounce of intelligence, they could find the well numbered theaters on their own, while earning barely enough money to keep your gas tank filled, really is NOT all that glamorous. But PUH-LEASE, lose the freakin' attitude, perhaps fake a smile, LOOK at people when then talk to you, and most importantly, when you answer their questions, do NOT start walking away from them and say your answers to the floor in front of you. And shave your chin...I'm scure you worked hard all week to get those six hairs as long as they are, but really, it's not very becoming. Oh, and running a comb through your hair really wouldn't kill you would it?

Just sayin.....but I digress...

Ghostie, ALCMDPP and I get into the theater and get seated. Luckily, it's about fifteen minutes to the start of the movie, because ALCMDPP got a phone call. And he answered it. In the theater. And proceeded to have a conversation with the person. A LOUD conversation. What I, and most of the other theater patrons, could gleam from the conversation is that someone was apparently in Seattle, couldn't get a plane until 11:00 tonight, didn't $400 to get the ticket changed, was trying to get into Delaware, or Baltimore-Washington International, had no where to stay, was given the suggestion by ALCMDPP to take a cab (to where, I'm not sure...Seattle to Delware would cost a smidge more than the person had, I'm sure), and found out that traffic was so bad here ALCMDPP wouldn't be able to get to him for hours anyway. At least that's what I, and most of the other theater patrons, got from hearing one side of the conversation. Granted, it was before the movie started, during the commercials they show, but really....well, it's just apparent that ALCMDPP doesn't have the same concerns about talking in public on his cellphone as I do: recall, I wouldn't talk on it in a bathroom with one other person in their.

Eventually, Ghostie and I, embarrassed by the whole thing, just got up and walked to seats on the other side of the theater. When he finished, ALCMDPP came and sat with us, totally oblivious to how loud he was actually talking. Until we told him that is.

And then, the movie started. We went to see Wanted. My review: Stupid. Stupid, insipid, and dumb. I could not believe a script this flat out stupid could ever get made. Basically, there's this Fraternity of assassins who can shot bullets in arcs and around corners and who get their orders from an ancient prophetic wheaving loom of fate.

No, seriously, I'm not kidding.

Not even an extended shirtless scene by the cute, gorgeously blue-eyed, James McAvoy could save this thing. To be fair, some of the action scenes, while stretching any believablity into the realm of impossibility, were fun to watch. And Common, as one of the assassins looked REAL fine (as did McAvoy). And the soundtrack was really outstanding. But really, that's all I got to say positive about this thing.

There's a plot twist in the latter half of the film that came as a surprise to I think no one. I saw it coming for at least a half hour. Terrance Stamp was totally wasted. He's an incredible actor, but here, he does little worth mentioning. Angelina Jolie looked anorexic to me, but I don't watch many of her films so maybe she looks that way all the time. Morgan Freeman is good in whatever film he's in, but he's not got much to work with here, and it really is a waste.

Oh and the plot...such that it was...*SIGH*. If Wesley was such a dweeb as he's protrayed in the beginning, how'd he get the attractive blonde, albeit bitchy, girlfriend to begin with? Why does no one in Chicago sees these two people riding the tops of the trains through town almost every night and calls the cops? How does Fox fall with the part of the train that falls first, but yet, when the car Wesley and Cross are in gets stuck, suddenly she's in that car? And how does Terrance Stamp, who was left at the train station, get to Wesley, get him out of the water, and get him back from Europe to Chicago all before Wesley wakes up? For that matter, if Fox comes all the way from Europe back to Chicago, don't you think she'd have time to clean the blood off her face and shirt collar before she walked into the Factory and gave Sloan the report? Wouldn't either the bitchy girlfriend or Barry ahve heard the gun rattling around in the toilet? From the angle he's got sitting in a chair, shooting across town, through the parking garage, up into the builing and across the room, is there any single angle or way possible, even with a lot of adrenline, that Wesley could EVEN see the guy at the end, much less shoot him? And in the end, was the Code actually followed, cause Wesley's still alive?

Dumb, stupid, inane. I could not suspend my disblief enough to enjoy this movie. And frankly, if I sitting there, thinking all the stuff I thought in the above paragraph, if all those holes in the movie are so obvious to me while watching it, it just can't be that good.

Don't waste your money. If you must see it, get it on Netflix in a few months when it comes out. Save your money for gas now.



The high point? This scene:





Just my two cents, take it for what it's worth. But if you go see it, don't say I didn't warn you.

POLT Listening to "Jump Around" by House Of Pain

See, we love - we love freedom. That's what they didn't understand. They hate things; we love things. They act out of hatred; we dont' seek revenge, we seek justice out of love. - George W. Bush