Back in 2006, I had a running list here on the Palace of the things I've learned that year. I stopped somewhere before the end of the year, don't really know why, and the list only got to 8 items, but I've gathererd them altogether and am posting them here, for the readers who weren't here in 2006.
#1: You cannot change the volume on an iPod with gloves on. It just won't let you.
#2: When going to shake some baby powder into your smelly sneakers, it's best to NOT be wearing a black dress shirt.
#3: It's a good idea to make sure you are FULLY awake before attempting to shave around your goatee in the morning...if you want to keep said goatee.
#4: When you're frying burgers on the stove, and you burn them so they stick to the bottom of the pan, it creates a somewhat dense fog throughout the whole apartment and adds the odor of brunt meat to the place, and your clothes, etc, etc, etc.
#5: When using a public restroom, if you're in a narrow, short stall, it's always a good idea to check the back of the stall's door for hooks before sitting.
#6: When attempting to apply Anbesol to a cold sore on the inside of your lip, it's best to NOT do it in the dark.
#7: If something or someone is off limits, leave it or them ALONE!
#8: There is a great difference between MENSA (a group for the highly intelligent) and mersa (an infection of the skin causing blood filled postules). It's best to KNOW there's a difference and what it is, because confusing the two can lead to unique and awkward situations.
Unfortuntely, I've not learned lesson #7 well at all, and am finding that I still violate that one on a regular basis...espeically the someONES....like guys already in relationships. Nuff said.
POLT Listening to "Starlight" by MUSE
A great empire and little minds go ill together. - Edmund Burke
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2 comments:
#9 Never put salt in your eyes.
Oh, I learned 7!
And by learned it, I mean know it's the truth, but ignore it anyway :P
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