Polt's Palace: Strangle all the christmas carols ...

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Strangle all the christmas carols ...

My Fairy Godfather emailed me this today...brought a chuckle to my lips.

Christmas Carols for the Psychologically Challenged

Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?
Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Queens Disoriented Are
Amnesia --- I Don't Know if I'll be Home for Christmas
Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and...
Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me
Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
Full Personality Disorder-- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll tell You Why
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --- Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells...
Agoraphobia --- I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't Leave My House
Senile Dementia --- Walking in a Winter Wonderland Miles From My House in My Slippers and Robe
Oppositional Defiant Disorder --- I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House
Social Anxiety Disorder --- Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate.

POLT

I can't believe I didn't commit that bit of arcane knowledge to my memory. - Leo, The West Wing

3 comments:

Ryan said...: cute!; 8:45 AM
Anonymous said...: I like the farmer version: Santa got run over by a John Deere.; 10:31 AM
The Persian said...: LOL I love the Paranoid one!!

*hugs*; 7:09 PM

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Movies I Have Seen In 2024...

What If...?, Season 2: Jan 1 (B+)
Saltburn: Jan 3 (B-)
Fall of '55: Jan 3 (C)
Lost Cities Reveals, With Albert Lim: Jan 5 - 6 (C)
Incredible Dr. Pol, Season 21: Jan 6 - 9 (B)
Incredible Dr. Pol, Season 22: Jan 10-12 ) B
Incredible Dr. Pol, Season 23: Jan 12- 14 (B)
Echo, Season 1: Jan 16
Lost Treasures of Egypt, Season 1: Jan 22-26 (B-)
Percy Jackson & Olympians, Season 1: Jan 25 - 30 (B-)
Lost Treasures Of Egype, Season 2: Jan 26 - 29 (B-)
Murder On The Orient Express (1974): Jan 27 (A-)
A Real Bug's Life: Jan 30 - 31 (B-)
Alexander, The Making Of A God (N): Feb 3 - 4 (B+)
Adonis (tubi): Feb 4 (C+)
Marvels: Feb 9 (C-)
Dr. Who: Genesis Of The Daleks (tubi): Feb 12 (C+)
Life On Our Planet (N): Feb 13 - 14 (A)
My Feet Are Killing Me, Season 1 (max): Feb 14 - 18 (B+)
My Feet Are Killing Me, Season 2 (max): feb 18 - 19 (B+)
My Feet Are Killing Me, Season 3 (max): Feb 19 - 20 (B)
My Feet Are Killing Me, Season 4 (max): Feb 20 - 23 (B)
Last Airbender (2024) (N): Feb 23 - 25 (A+)
Einstein And The Bomb (N): Feb 25 (B-)
Doctor Who, City Of Death: Feb 26 (B+)
Doctor Who, Planet Of Fire (tubi): Feb 26 (C-)
Caligula, with Mary Beard (tubi): Feb 26 (A)
MASH, The Comedy That Changed TV (tubi): Feb 26 (A)
Doctor Who, The Ark In Space(tubi): Feb 27 (A-)
Doctor Who, Revenge Of The Cybermen (tubi): Feb 28 (B-)
Doctor Who, The Sontaran Experiment(tubi): Feb 28 (C)
Doctor Who, Terror Of The Zygons (tubi): Feb 29 (C)
Doctor Who, Planet Of Evil (tubi): Mar 1 (D+)
Doctor Who, Inferno (tubi): Mar 1 - 2 (B)
Doctor Who, Terror Of The Autons (tubi) : Mar 2 (C)
Doctor Who, Mark Of The Rani (tubi): Mar 3 (D)
Doctor Who, Time And The Rani (Tubi): Mar 3 (C-)
Dune, Part 1 (Hulu): Mar 4 (B+)
A Haunting In Venice (hulu): Mar 4 (B-)
Doctor Who, Delta And The Bannermen (tubi): Mar 4 (F)
Doctor Who, Dragonfire (tubi): Mar 4 (C)
Doctor Who, Tomb Of The Cybermen (tubi): Mar 5 (B)
Great Expectations (2024) (hulu): Mar 5 - 7 (B-)
Doctor Who, The Daleks (tubi): Mar 6 (B)
Doctor Who, The Brain Of Morbius (tubi): Mar 8 (C+)
Jerry Brown, The Disrupter (PBS): Mar 9 (B)
Serpent Queen (Starz): Mar 9 - 11 (A-)
Oppenheimer (peacock): Mar 12 (B-)
Doctor Who: The Dalek Invasion Of Earth (tubi): Mar 13 - 14 (B-)
Doctor Who: The Keeper Of Traken (tubi): Mar 16 (B+)
Turning Point, The Bomb & The Cold War (N): Mar 16 - 18 (A+)
Damsel (N): Mar 20 (D)
Quiet On The Set, The Dark Side of Kids TV (max): Mar 21 -
Rome: Empire Without Limit With Mary Beard (freevee): Mar 23 (B+)
The Great Fire Of London In Real Time (Prime): Mar 24 (C+)
Who Done It: The Clue Documentary (Prime): Mar 24 -25 (B-)
Chernobyl: The Lost Tapes (Max): Mar 25 (B+)
American Dynasties, The Kennedys (Max): Mar 25 - 26 (A-)
The Harvest, Integrating Mississippi's Schools (PBS): Mar 27 (B+)
Doctor Who 60th Anniversary Specials (Disney+): Mar 28 (A)
Madu (Disney+): Mar 29 (A)
Doctor Who, Greatest Show In The Galaxy (tubi): Mar 30 (C)
Escape From New York (WBoro Theater); Mar 30 (B)
Hercules (Disney+): Mar 31 (B+)
Testament The Story Of Moses (N): Mar 31-Apr1 (C)
Minions: The Rise Of Gru (Prime): Apr 1 (B-)
Homicide New York (N): Apr 2 - 3 (A)
Rustin (N): Apr 5 (B+)
Invincible, Season 2 (prime): Apr 6 -7 (A)
Brother Outsider: The Life Of Bayard Rustin (N): Apr 8 (B)
Amadeus (N): Apr 8 (A+)
Crime Scene Berlin, Nightlife KIller (N): Apr 8 (B)
Midnight Movies, From The Margin To The Mainstream (Starz): Apr 10 (B-)
Medici The Magnificent, Season 3 (N): Apr 11 - 13 (B-)
X-Men, Days Of Future Past (Disney+): Apr 13 (A-)
Am. Exp,, The Busing Battleground (PBS): Apr 14 (A)
Am. Exp. Citizen Hearst (PBS): Apr 14 (B-)
Am. Masters: Moynihan (PBS): Apr 15 (B)
Titanic's Final Mystery (Paramount+): Apr 15 (C)
Invasion Of The Body Snatchers (1956) (Paramount+): Apr 15 (A-)
Feud, Season 2 (Truman v Swans)(Hulu): Apr 15-16 (B-)
Feud, Season 1 (Bette v Joan) (Hulu): Apr 16-18 (A)
California Suite (Tubi): Apr 20 (B-)
Greek Island Odyssey (Paramount+): Apr 21 - 22 (C)
Secrets Of The Octopus (Disney+): Apr 22 (C+)
House Of Cards Trilogy (Roku Channel): Apr 23 -
The Princess And The Frog (Disney+): Apr 27 (B+)
Doomed: The Untold Story Of Roger Corman's Fantastic Four (tubi): Apr 27 (C+)
Our Living World (N): Apr 29 (C+)
Dead Boy Detectives (N): Apr 29 - May 1 (A)
Doctor Who, Season 4 (max): May 2-4 (A+)
The Ballad of Greenwich Village (tubi): May 5 (C)
Geek And You Shall Find (tubi): May 6 (A-)
Missing, Dead Of Aive (N): May 7 (B)
The Texas Killing Fields (N): May 8 (B+)
Fallout (Amazon): May 9 - 11 (A)
Doctor Who, Season 14: May 10 - Jun 22 (B+)
Till Murder Do Us Part, Soering vs Haysom (N): May 12 (A)
Dr. Pol, Season 24 (Disney+): May 12 - 15 (B)
Spacey Unmasked (Max): May 14 (B)
30 For 30, Broke (N): May 15 (C)
X-Men 97 (Disney+): May 15 - 17 (C)
Shogun (Disney+): May 17 - 20 (B+)
Becket (Roku): May 20 (C+)
Bob's Burgers, Season 14 (Hulu) : May 20 - 24 (C+)
Dune, Part 2 (Max): May 21 (B-)
The Innocent Man (N): May 26 (A-)
England's Forgotten Queen: The Life And Death of Lady Jane Gray (Prime): May 26-27 (B-)
She-Wolves: England's Early Queens (Prime): May 27-28 (B-)
The Boys In The Board (Prime): May 29 (C)
The Riot Report (PBS): May 30 (A-)
Star Trek: Discovery, Season 5 (Paramount): May 31 - Jun 4 (B-)
ST Short Treks (paramount): Jun 4 - 5 (A-)
Apollo's Moon Shot (paramount): Jun 5 (A)
Hello Dolly! (disney+): Jun 6 (D+)
Saving Private Ryan (peacock): Jun 8 (A+)
30 for 30: OJ, Made In America (N): Jun 7-9 (A)
I Killed My Father (N): Jun 9-10 (B+)
Sins Of Our Mother (N): Jun 10 (B+)
Shirley (N): Jun 10 (B)
All Of Us Strangers (Hulu): Jun 13 (B-)
Walking Britain's Roman Roads (Prime): Jun 14 - 15 (B+)
House Of The Dragon, Season 2 (MAX): Jun 17 -
Poisoned Ground: The Tragedy At Love Canal (PBS): Jun 17 (B+)
The Insufferable Mr. Buckley (PBS): Jun 17 (C-)
Disco: Soundtrack Of A Revolution (PBS): Jun 18 (A)
Chinatown (Paramount+): Jun 20 (C)
Mary And George (Starz): Jun 21 - 23 (B)
Grantchester, Season 9 (PBS): Jun 25 - 27 (B)
The Walking Dead, Season 1 (Netflix): Jun 30 - Jul 1 (A)
Outstanding, A Comedy Revolution (Netflix): Jul 4 (A+)
Magna Carta: Unlocked (prime): Jul 4 - 5 (B-)
The West Wing, Season 1 (MAX): Jul 15 - 19 (A-)
The West Wing, Season 2 (MAX): Jul 19 - 22 (A+)
The West Wing, Season 3 (MAX): Jul 22 - 27 (A+)
The West Wing, Season 4 (MAX): Jul 27 - 29 (A+)
The West Wing, Season 5 (MAX): Jul 30 - Aug 4 (B-)
Deadpool Wolverine (Leitersburg): Aug 3 (C-)
The West Wing, Season 6 (MAX): Aug 4 - 8 (B)
The West Wing, Season 7 (MAX): Aug 8 - 10 (A)
Dirty Pop, A Boy Band Scandal (N): Aug 10 (B)
The Boys, Season 4 (Prime): Aug 11-12 (C-)
Umbrella Academy, Season 4 (N): Aug 13 (B+)
Acolyte (Disney+): Aug 16 - 17 (C)
Batman: Caped Crusader (Prime): Aug 18 - 19 (B+)
Evil, Season 1 (N): Aug 18 -
Seprent Queen, Season 2 (Starz): Aug 27 - 30 (B+)
Kaos (N): Sep 1 (A+)
Joanna Lumley's Britain (Prime): Sept 2 (B)
Remembering Gene Wilder (N): Sept 3 (B+)
Six Schizophrenic Brothers (Max): Sept 4 (B)
Upstairs Inferno (Roku): Sept 9 (B)
Interview With The Vampire, Minisereis (N): Spet 13 (A-)
Apollo 13 Survival (N): Sept 14 (B+)
Muscles & Mayham (N): Sept 17-18 (B)
Monsters, The Lyle And Erick Menendez Story (N): Sept 19 - 21 (B)
Agatha All Along (Disney+): Sept 24 - Oct 30 (B)
Inside Out 2 (Disney+): Sept 25 (B-)
5B (Peacock): Sept 27 (A+)
Commitment To Life (Peacock): Sept 27 (A-)
Invitation To A Murder (Roku): Sept 28 (B+)
LOTR, Rings Of Power, Season 2 (Prime): Oct 4 - 7 (C+)
Heartstopper, Season 3 (N):Oct 7 - 8 (A+)
Charles 1: The Kill A King (Prime): Oct 13 (A-)
Am. Sports Story: Aaron Hernandez (Disney+): Oct 17 - Nov 13 (B-)
The Girl In The Picture (N): Oct 21 (B-)
Mayfair Witches (N): Oct 21 - 22 (C)
Legends Of Vox Machina, Season 3 (Prime): Oct 24-25 (C+)
Legends Of the Superheroes (Tubi): Nov 11 (F)