I hate urinals!
There...just needed to be said. Anytime I'm in a public restroom, I always choose the toilet stall. Urinals are just digusting.
You ladies probably won't be able to appreciate this. the sight of looking down into a urinal, and seeing the little puddle of who knows how many different people's urine. Hearing the puddle bubble and splatter when you're pissing into it. Feeling the urine from the puddle splatter out onto your legs when you're wearing shorts. And the odor that wafts up to assault your nostrils...well, that's best left undescribed. Yes, it is a regular feast for the senses. (all the sense except taste....and even Uncle Polt doesn't have the stomach to go there...)
"But don't piss into the puddle at the bottom," you say. "You can pee into the back of the urinal, and let it run down into the puddle." yes, i can...and have the unmitigated joy of feeling my own urine then splatter onto the backs of my hands and front of my pants or shorts. That's always fun.
The only good thing I can think of for urinals is that it allows you to cop a peek and what the cute guy at another urinal is packing. But even that has a downside, I mean getting you ass kicked in a public restroom is definately not something desirable.
But on the upside, when my job is going badly, and my co-workers are working on my one last good nerve and my boss is making me consider purchasing a fire arm to go postal with, I just say to myself, "Self, it could be worse. You're job could be Urinal Cake Replacer."
POLT = listening to "Disarm" by The Smashing Pumpkins
Oh we're so pretty, we're so pretty vacant! - The Sex Pistols
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