Come on Jerry, let's dump this load...
Well, this is the first night of Season 5 of Project Runway. I heard next season's moving to Los Angeles...without Heidi or Tim. I don't know how true that is, but I'll not dwell on that now, we'll just enjoy this season, shall we?
Let's run through things as I wrote them down.
Suede: Okay, Polt thinks that people who refer to themselves in the third person while talking to you are quite pretentious, and therefore, Polt doesn't much like Suede. And besides, the guy's 37, it's time for him to lose the faux-hawk, the dyed hair, the ripped clothes and quit trying to act like someone 20 years younger. Your youth is long gone, sweetness, move along. The sooner they get rid of this joker, the better.
Blayne: Okay, we all know how I HATED Christian from last season. I thought he was an arrogant, overrated little yappy poodle dog. Blayne, unfortunately, reminds me of Christian...but not in an irritating way. He reminds me of a little, tanned (overly tanned) puppy that I just want to have sit on my lap, and who allows me to stroke him softly (read whatever double entendre into that that you wish.) I like the kid, despite that HORRID dress/diaper thingee he made, despite the fact it looks like he's been on a small island with no shade for months, and despite his pathetic attempt at a Christian-like "fierce" term: girl-icious. Please, Blayne, sweetie, just shut up and sit quietly on my lap, kay? I don't think he'll last.
Jerell: Talk, young, lean black man...well, I certainly am intersted in him....to be my new bedmate. Seems a bit snippy, not that I'll care much about that when we're having sex. Not sure if I like him yet, other than his looks.
Stella: Older, rough around the edges, just knows she's gonna get eliminated, stresses constantly...is she this season's Sweet Pea? She caught a BIG break this week, with her crappy plastic bag piece of garbage. Doubt she'll get another such chance.
Kelli: I like her, she seems like fun. She makes me laugh: "It's pretty ugly in a great way." Well you go girl!
Joe: Ah, the token straight guy, has to be one every season, doesn't there? I'm sure we'll hear a bunch more about his daughters, and how they really need daddy to do well on the show...on the epsiode when he's auf-ed. That's the way they normally do it.
Daniel: I don't think I like him, altough I might, given time. Seems a bit too...high strung? Perfectionist? I don't know...
Jerry: Oh, he's already a big time designer, eh? Just a smidge Jerry-centic, aren't you Sparky? I am not impressed.
Keith: Sexy tat, muscles, looks good in a wife beater and stubble, were those piercings in his nipples I saw? He just screams rough trade to me, and if there's one thing I like, it's making rough trade scream!
Kenley: Everytime I see her, I think Anna Hathaway. Not sure why, or what it means.
Wesley: Very preppy, very A&F. Very cute, even in strange shorts or aviator glasses. I'm liking him. But I don't remember what he designed.......
The others, I have no opinion on yet. But that will change as the season progresses.
My predictions: Daniel wins, Jerry goes home.
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Now, before we announce the winners, some quotes from this week:
"I didn't want to make just another dress." "You didn't." - Tim Gunn
That was just butt ugly. - Heidi Klum
It's what you would wear if you were killing someone. - NINAGARCIA
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Winner: Kelli. Ok, I can accept that. Still thought Daniel's was better though.
Loser: Jerry. Thank God.
POLT Listening to "Morning Wood" by Nth Degree
If you can't find any weirdness maybe we'll just have to make some! - Calvin & Hobbes
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