St Patrick's day is just a few days away and I haven't even figured out which bars I'll start my lunch at yet. Philly must have at least 50 Irish bars and I don't even know where a good drink special can be found. On top of that, several of my normal drinking buddies are gonna be out of town this weekend. I have such a bad feeling about this oh so holy of holidays. If I don't have people to look out for me, I'll be shit faced by 8pm and drunkenly hitting on random females. (How is that different from any other weekend? - Polt) I don't mind having a few regrets after a hard St. Patty's day, but I at least need people to remember it for me. This is kind of a short post but I know I'm obligated to say something about male reproductive organs, so here goes: Normally my drunken evenings end with some blue balls, but this Friday they could end up green. (planning on running into a gay leprechaun with a bucket of green paint, are ye laddie? - Polt) Happy St. Patrick's day.
Remember, if you're wearing a kilt and beads and drinking green beer, you're not Irish, you're stupid. (or at a Gay Pride celebration! - Polt)
POLT = listening to "So Alive" by Love & Rockets
We don't have to like each other, Jo, we're family. - Claudia, Home For The Holidays
3 comments:
Polt said:
"drunkenly hitting on random females."
What? I thought you were queer like me. I always hit on the straight boys, and damm, if if doesn't work 12.5% of the time!
Onanite
no no no, this is the weekly straight boy column. if i was gay, women wouldn't drive me to drink. i'd have to drive myself.
No, Onanite, sweetie, I AM queerer than a three dollar bill. BUt Testicular Tuesdays with Johnnie is written by a str8 boy (yeah, I know man, I TRIED to bring him over from the dark side, but these kids nowadays are stubborn). He's the ones that will be wantonly and drunkenly chasing women...which is silly to me, cause as I told him, if he went into a gay bar, he'd not even HAVE to get drunk, I'm certain one of the first three people he spoke to would be more than happy to take him home and show him the error of his ways. But oh, well...
12.5%? For hitting on str8 guys??? Damn, man, I need lessons from you, that's for sure!
verification word: xpagxawr
(x-PAAG-zour)
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