The day after fear, Jesus....

So, I am doing better now, after yesterday's news. When I finished that post, I fumed and paced a bit around the house. I wanted to fuck someone, as I said, but I settled for getting on Yahoo Messenger, and starting up my webcam and showing the naughty bits around the world and....um, released some of the emotions I had piled up inside. Twice. Not the same as having raw, hard, sweaty sex with some stranger, but it was close enough. (I KNOW that's too much information...I don't care. I've moved on from anger to apathy now, so dealwith it. Or don't. What do I care?)

That helped, but not enough. So I strapped on the iPod and took a walk. And hour walk. And I was walking fast! And I even took hills, not avoiding them as I usually do (my calves still hurt even today). As I returned home here, I realized it was about 700 and I had not had anything to eat since 1100. I was hungry for KFC but 1) they are expensive, and 2) that food's not good for me. This is what I told myself. And then I said, to myself, "Ya know, if EVER i needed comfort food, NOW is it. Fuck the cost. Fuck the health value. I WANT KFC!"

So I had to drive there, and I did. I pulled into the drive through, not wanting to actually go inside and have to talk to people directly, I still didn't want to talk to anyone. I pulled in behind a green SUV. And I waited. And waited. And waited some more. After 4 minutes (yes I imted it) the green SUV pulled ahead. I pulled up to the speaker box, and the voice said, "Welcome to KFC, I'll be with you in a moment." Finally 6 minutes late (yes, I timed it) I yelled at the speaker, "HELLLLOOOO!!! Is there anyone FUCKING there?"

The voice came back and said, "I'm sorry for the delay, can I take your order." I ordered a 6 piece meal (I had a LOT to comfort, don't judge me. Its' not like YOU haven't gone through a pint of Haagen-Daz in one sitting, eh?), and as I was trying to say I wanted it mixed, the voice came and said, "Okay, and 8 piece meal, what do you want for you two sides?"

I took a few deep breaths to keep from punching the speaker box and said, not quite shouting but VERY forcefully, "6 PIECE, 6PIECE, 6 PIECE, I WANT A 6 PIECE!" A fter getting the rest of my order, I pulled around to the window, and found the green SUV STILL sitting there!! What in God's name could be taking so long? Were they killing and plucking the chickens on site? I canNOT believe the waits there! And especially that night, when I was having sucha bad day! Murphy's Law is alive and well, eh? And when I got the chicken home, they didn't give me any bisquits. Oh I wanted to say something, but I didn't. I just ate my chicken, glad and content that I had it finally.

PART2:
Okay, then a bit later in the evening, I got a phone call from this irate guy I didn't even know. Earlier in the week, I had a card to a friend of mine and his live-in boyfriend. They were silly little cards....with naked men on the front. Only, the address I had was the wrong was, and it was like the place where he used to live, with like and ex or something. And this was the ex calling me (cause i HAD to put my return address on them), ranting and raving about harassment or what have you. And he refused to return them to sender. He wanted my friend to call him and he MIGHT give them to him. Oh GOD! Would this day NEVER end!

So i had to call my friend, who was sick as a dog, puking his guts out in the bathroom when I called. I talked to his boyfriend a bit before he took the phone himself. And I explained what had happened. So he said he'd call the guy tomorrow, and see what was up. But he didn't sound like he wanted to. OH, there would be drama! But he's such a cool guy, doing this even though he felt crappy.

And THEN Ace got kicked off AMerican Idol! Oh the tragedy! No, anyway, I went to bed and was asleep by 1015, I'm sure, which is unusual cause I rarely go to bed before 1100. And then, on top of it all, because of the stress and shit (or maybe it was because of the 5 piece of KFC I gorged myself on) I did NOT sleep well. Tossing and turning. stiff neck. Not being able to go to sleep. This happened for a few hours. The last time I remember looking at the clock, it was after 3 in the morning. A fter that, things went pretty well sleep wise, and I got up at 900.

Part3:
I got online, did the HNT, and felt pretty okay, as long as I was distracted by the Internet and didn't think about the pay raise/card fiascos. I had taken the day off work earlier in the week cause I was driving to visit a friend of mine. We were going to eat lunch and then hang out. I didn't really feel like going and seriously thought about calling him and canceling. But then i thought it would do me good to get out of the apartment, take a drive, and have something to occupy my mind.

And I'm glad i did.

this post is pretty long, so I'l stop this one here, and cotinue all this in the next post.

POLT = listening to "Monk E. Dreams" by Motomo

But if you could just see the beauty, these things I can never describe. - Joy Division, Isolation