Have I mentioned that I HATE heat? I hate humidity? I hate summer, and any month that FEELS like summer??? Did I ever express these feelings before?
As I was driving home, the thermometer said 95 degrees. Thank GOD the car has air conditioning. I hate this weather now because a) it's the end of May, not the end of July, and the weather outta reflect that and b) just last week, the high was like mid 60s, and now, 7 days later, it's 30 degress higher!
Because of the quick change in temps, I haven't had a chance to put the air conditioners in in my apartment. When I got home, it was like 88 degrees INSIDE! It's not too terribly bad now, cause I got the windows open and the fans blowin right over me. BUt it's still kinda warm. SO I figured, FINE! It's gonna be this hot this quick, I am NOT being uncomfortable, so I'm running around the apartment, and even typing this right now, buck-screaming-naked!
I'll pause now to let you all form and digest that visual.
Done puking yet? Good. wipe that vomit from your chin...right there. Good, now we can continue. I guess I'll have to put the a/c in, but only after the sun goes down and it cools off some, cause it's so hard to get it in right, I always get all sweaty, and cut my finger on some sharp edge or what have you. It's a bitch to stay cool. When I win the lottery and get millions, I'm gonna devise an airconditioned suit, like an astronauts outfit, and that'll keep me fully cooled off at ALL times! Course, I guess the extension cords are gonna be a bitch, eh?
POLT - listening to "Go Your Own Way" by Fleetwood Mac
When you are as old as I, young man, you will know there is only one thing in the world worth living for, and that is win. - Lady Jane Francesca Wilde
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4 comments:
The temperature must be taking it's cue from the gas prices. They've been going up and down by as much as 30 and 40 cents all in the same day.
About the visual, be sure not to catch any of your important parts on the air conditioners hardwares. I'm sure that a cut finger would be much more preferable than accidental castration. I mean.....what would Mama Shockey say???
On the other hand you could have a new career in the Vienna Boys Choir which might actually pay more.
We had 94-95 on both Sunday and Monday. cooled off to 89 today.
My 14 yr old car no longer has air. Never used to need it hear in Michigan for all those years. Must be global warming in general.
Fairy Melting Godfather
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Mark: I'll make sure I keep all my appendages safe when I put the a/c in.
Brad: Oh man I am the exact opposite. Heat sucks and the hotter it is, the less I move around. But in the winter, I LOVE playing in the snow! (Course, since you're in san Deigo, I guess snow playing's kinda outta the question, eh?)
Ed: I would agree with you...except when it's ME! Wouldn't mind seeing some other guys running around bare assed naked, but not myself, not so much, no.
Velma: God bless you for trying, but that's not quite an all encompassing suit. Still, might be worth the investment anyway....
What you need to do is just come out to San Francisco. We don't have crazy ass heat over here. And when we do, it's delicious.
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