Friday, August 25, 2006

I need some infomation first. Just the basic facts...

I might not be posting much this weekend. I may have mentioned previously that next weekend I was getting a "special visitor" and I am. However, said "special visitor" decided to surprise me with a visit THIS weekend as well. Ain't he sweet? So what with work and the "special visitor" I'll likely be tied up most of the weekend (not literally speaking...or hell maybe literally, who knows) and unable to post. I might drop a post each day, just so everyone knows I'm still alive an kicking.
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At any rate, I found this list of facts on my buddy The Persian's blog, and as I read through it, several thoughts kept popping into my head, so I thought I'd copy it and post it, and my thought.

So here are some fun
(and somewhat interesting) factoids:

Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning
(not me man, I need to mainline caffeine. And coffee fits better in an IV than an apple)
Walt Disney was afraid of mice.
The inventor of the flushing toilet was Thomas Crapper.
The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do.
(I know there's a masturbation joke in there somewhere, but I'm not going looking for it)
During World War II, IBM built the computers the Nazis used to manage their death/concentration camps.
The number of people alive on earth right now is higher than the number of all the people that have died. Ever.
(that's just mind-boggling)
Men can breastfeed babies
(Um....okay...but i've never gotten anything from any of the male nipples i've been suckling on)
There is a rare condition called Exploding Head Syndrome which you have probably never heard of.
(Yeah, it happens when you try to make sense of all of Bushie's lies, your head explodes)
Honey is the only food that does not spoil. Honey found in the tombs of
Egyptian pharaohs has been tasted by archaeologists and found edible.
("Sure, Dr. Schneidernecker, I'll open this several thousand year old container and taste what's inside, no problem.")
The Population of the world can live within the state boundaries of Texas.
(And with the Republicans in control of the voting, Bushie would STILL win the state)
Plastic lawn flamingos outnumber real flamingos in the U.S.A.
(they cost less to feed and are easier to clean up after)
Tourists visiting Iceland should know that tipping at a restaurant is considered an insult!
The green stuff on the occasional freak potato chip is chlorophyll.
(I still ain't gonna eat it. Nope.)
2,500 lefties die each year using products designed for rightists.
(Hence why righties live 8 years longer, eh?)
Napoleon was terrified of cats.
(well, yeah, but what thinking person isn't?)
Russia has the most movie theaters in the world.
(Oh, if Reagan were still alive he'd be complaining about the "Theater Gap" and throwing all kinds of money into new movie theater construction, with $6000 movie seats. Cant' t let the Commies get ahead of us!)
The stall closest to the door in a bathroom is the cleanest, because it is the least used.
(It doesn't matter which one I choose, it was always used last by a homeless guy who loves chili and deviled eggs and has a chronic case of explosive diarrhea. Or at least it seems so.)
If you put a raisin in a glass of champagne, it will keep floating to the top and sinking to the bottom.
(well, if you submerged ME in a glass of champagne, I bet I'd be swerving all over the road, left to right, if I drove afterwards! the little bugger's just getting drunk.)
Nondairy creamer is flammable.
It's rumored that sucking on a copper penny will cause a breathalyzer to read 0.
(Ew....I think it'd just be easier to not drink in the first place!)

Anywho, kids, have fun! I'll post when I get the chance!

POLT - listening to "Angel" by Massive Attack


Why can't we remind the holier-than-thou regressives of what Proverbs states about the difficulty of a rich man entering heaven, equating it to a camel - or is it the GOP elephant? - passing through the eye of a needle? - Lawrence Angle, Dec 7, 2004

4 comments:

katarina said...

I'm soooo jealous.

m_o_o_nspells said...

Go git 'im, Poltie...and don't waste time blogging!!! Tell us all the torrid details when the weekend's over! ;o)
Have fun!

tornwordo said...

Those are interesting. And the people alive versus dead - That's incorrect, which is why it sounds so mind boggling.

Anonymous said...

If there are more people alive now than have ever lived that kind of knocks the reincarnation idea in the head huh? Both guests and fish stink after three days. Honey never spoils and it is made only by bees. If we can put a man on the moon why can't we make a machine that makes Honey? It might be in Proverbs because Jesus often quoted the Old Testament, but it was Jesus in the New Testament that said to his disciples, "It is easier for a Camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven". Since several of his disciples were wealthy (one was a tax collector, one was a physician etc.) They said to Him, Who can be saved? He answered, "With God all things are possible". Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart, that you might have life and more abundantly!Today's sermon brought to you by the fine people of the church of tomorrow. Donations accepted, as always.