Ya know, there is so much i need to be doing around the apartment here, especically in light of the fact i'm having a special visitor next weekend (but more on that later), but I just don't do it. IN the mornings, as I'm rushing around to get ready to for, I tell myself, "Man, tonight when I get home I will HAVE to do something. Maybe the dishes? Maybe clear off the coffee table? Maybe the bathroom? Maybe the dining room table? Maybe straighten up the bedroom a bit? Yeah, I'll do something like that when I get home."
And then I get home and what do I do? Set on my fat ass in front of the computer screen posting to my blog or downloading porn (oh like YOU don't! Don't judge me.) And meanwhile, nothing else gets done. I wish I had a bit of motivation for cleaning, but I don't. I hate it, I always have. It just seems so useless. Why dust? It's just gonna get dusting again.
I have not made my bed in well over 15 years. Oh, I've changed my sheets, I do that on a regular basis, but I never actually make the bed. It makes no sense to me. I'm gonne be getting back in it and messing up the covers and all again that night, why bother to pull the sheets up and arrange the pillows, etc, etc, etc. Its' not like anyone's gonna actually SEE the bed. And if they do, well, they're friends of mine who KNOW what a slob i am, or they're guys I've brought home to fuck, and like they're gonna CARE what if my bed's made or not.
But despite all this, I do wish i'd have a bit more desire to clean. Just to keep things a bit more tidy. Course, if I stopped buyin books, and canceled my magazine subscriptions, and threw some shit out, well THAT would help with the mess certainly!
BUt whatcha gonna do? May as well wish for a purple sky, or the body of the guy from Snakes On A Plane or what have you. The fact is, I'm a packrat. And a messy one at that. And that's the way it is. Period, end of story.
POLT = listening to "Human Behavior" by Bjork
Keep your eyes on your friends, because your enemies will take care of themselves. - JR Ewing, Dallas
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5 comments:
I guess it's true what they say, men live like bears with furniture. I hate cleaning too. I do like running the vacuum cleaner. Topic change: If they vote James off of the Big brother show, I'll quit watching. I like watching Runway though. Auf Wiedersehen!
I've never known a sloppy gay man. I may never believe this. It's just not true.
I never make my bed either. It cuts down on my morning rush around time. My mom never made me make it unless there were people coming over. Who cares. Some people are too fussy.
another reference to snakes on a plane...
dude.
Who needs to make a bed... I had to make military corners on my sheets as a kid [and they were checked by mommie dearest] so now I have a bottom sheet and a comforter. I change the pillowcases daily and the sheet every few days. Since it's 480 degrees here at night, the comforter has been in the far rumpled corner for at least 5 months....
Hmmmm....
Wouldn't the question 'why make the bed when its going to get messed up anyway?' be similar to other situations and rhetorical questions?
Such as:
'why wash the racing stripes out of your underwear when they're only going to reappear again the next time you wear them?' You could save a lot of time by skipping laundry. Same principle isn't it?
Or:
'why wash the dishes when they're only going to get dirty again after the next meal?' You could save both water and energy (to heat the water) by skipping this task. Same principle, no?
Or:
'why wipe your butt when its only gonna get dirty again on your next bathroom visit?' Just think of all the money you could save on toilet paper.
With all of the time, energy and money that you save you would have more of those things to use for other purposes (e.g. downloading porn, spending $$ on the dancers in Toronto, etc.)
Just saying.............
(Anal Retentive) Fairy Godfather
Ed: Bears with furniture? BWAHAHAHAH!!!
Katarina: Johnnie told me once: Polt you can't cook, you have no fashion sense and your apartment is a mess...you are the straightest gay man I know! Maybe that explains it.
Velma: Yeah, comforter is comfrotably under the bed this time of year. in a ball.
Mark:Ah, but laundry, dishes, and wiping all have hygenic purposes behind them. MAKING a bed has none. Changing a bed, well that does, but MAKING it...nope, not so much.
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